More conflict just happened recently. whatever happened to trying to live a drama-free life!!?? but aside from that thing (which i'll elaborate on soon), most other parts of life have been good, so that's a point of gratitude. for instance, my professor seems pretty pleased with my research progress despite the lull from the japan trip. just have to make a few more precursors and separate a crude mixture. i think we're close! perhaps in another month or so, if all goes well. it's important enough that my professor says once the compound is out, and we verify that it works as intended, it'll be sent for publication immediately. no cell testing, animal testing, or whatever. that really gives you an idea of how much of a potential impact it has, if you're in the know about how hard it can be to get your professor's consent to submit a piece of work.

another thing to be kind-of happy about is that i finally overcame the inertia, fear, trepidation, and various other inhibitons, and went down to ritual for a trial. i'd done a fair bit of research about the place already, so there wasn't anything really new or shocking. there were a few bonus nice touches, like an amazing locker/shower room, where the lockers came with USB ports and cables for phone charging. the staff were extremely nice, patient and friendly, too. but then again, i'm a paying customer (the trial costs $50, instead of being free like i'd posted previously - my mistake) so it's somewhat expected. that's why i'm often skeptical about service staff being nice. truly nice people (like me) are nice to you even when they have nothing to gain from being nice...but i digress. i had a postural assessment and my first session. according to the nice coach who assessed me, i'm slouching too much and using more of my right side. understandable, because i'm right-handed. the slouching thing was a bit of a surprise. i'm sure that i don't have model-like posture, but i thought that judo would have helped to refine my posture to some extent at least. or maybe without judo, i'd be a hunched-over wreck by now. who knows? the session itself was killer. it lasted for only 20-ish minutes, but i was completely wiped out by the end. and even though i had SJI/CJC training earlier in the day, i don't think it affected anything all that much. may have died a little less badly, but would have still died nonetheless. in fact, i remember one of the coaches asking me, "how're you doing?" after the workout ended. my response, predictably, was, "dying". i am grateful, though. it gave me this inner burning feeling that lasted for most of yesterday. i guess that's a good sign? at least it felt like one to me. i think it's my body doing something in response to the sudden shock of going up so many notches in activity. would have gone down today too, but they're closed on sundays.

i'm still early in the trial, but i've more or less decided to sign up for 6 months, off-peak. it seems to be more expensive after factoring in parking, ERP, and other assorted charges, but i have to remember that i save overall due to the difference in membership package prices. that's an occasional flaw of mine, that i forget to look at the big big picture. i suppose in the worst-case scenario, i can pay the difference to convert to a full membership sometime along the way. for this trial period, my plan is to go in (almost) every day and find a time that suits me, along with doing some data collection about traffic volume, ERP times and charges, parking rates and availability, etc.

alongside the exercise part, another major lifestyle change i have to make is my diet. i don't think that i eat super unhealthily or super excessively, but i do acknowledge that much much more can be done to improve/optimize my eating habits and food choices. they have this thing called the "grub guide" which teaches you to reset your body and optimize its fuel consumption. first thought: i wish i could do that for the car. maybe that's what servicing's for? as far as my body's concerned, i guess i'll try to complete phase 1, which lasts a month, then see how i feel from there. should maybe consider a trip to the supermarket too, to stock up on some healthy alternatives in which NUS canteens are lacking. at the same time, i don't think i'll do the eat clean thing 100%. it might be achievable in japan, but here? not so much. definitely not impossible, just probably not worth the extra hassle. i don't know. on the other hand, it might be therapeutic to have a food prep/cooking day. we'll see.

that person is the root cause of how all this got started. strangely, we haven't talked at all in the past week. misaligned schedules, probably. saw them on skype today, but didn't initiate conversation as i was headed for judo class. as time goes by, i become less sure of whether anything will come out of it at all. signs point to no as of now. perhaps it's a hint that i should improve myself before trying any of this socializing stuff...you know, look inwards before looking outwards. too bad i made this discovery just today, because the conflict (which happened on friday) kind of revolves around this issue.

remember sometime last year, i tried to mediate a conflict between 2 of my friends? the gist is that one friend did something which the other friend had issues with, and didn't apologize to the other friend's satisfaction. things them snowballed from there. throughout my conversations with the friend who had had the thing done to him, i always asked, "is there anything anyone could do to make it better?". the answer was always more or less, "build a time machine and ensure that the issue leading to the conflict never happened" ie. "no". previously, i'd thought that my friend was overreacting and being rather stubborn. it's thanks to this conflict that just happened to me, that i finally came to understand why he replies in this way. you see, most conflict that arises from material damage can be fixed. just replace the thing in question. like if you lose or damage something i lent you, get me a new thing. of course, it's not always easy or cheap, like if someone were to wreck my car, or if i were to destroy something limited-edition or something with great sentimental value. but somehow, some of the damage can be mitigated with a duplicate of the thing, if duplication is possible.

things completely change when knowledge/information is involved.

you see, you can't un-know something. students (myself included) may disagree. in fact, i have extremely limited recollection of the whole partition function and boltzmann distribution thing from year 2 physical chem, for instance. but when it comes to something simpler, eg. "so-and-so's parents are divorced", "his partner cheated on him", "he beats his wife", "she's a drug addict"....people don't forget these things easily, because they're easy to remember due to their "juicy" nature. as you smart people may have already guessed, my conflict involves information, as did my friends' conflict. trying to avoid airing too much dirty laundry here, so let's just focus on the present case. the long story short is that someone knows something about me that they should not know. normally i'd still be somewhat ok with it and pretend that nothing happened...just that this person had to flaunt the knowledge in my face, despite my previous indication that i wanted my privacy, and would tell them on my own terms. i swear, each new conflict lets me discover that my anger can reach new heights. it is seriously the first time in probably a decade where i have contemplated physical violence as an actual possibility. not even the whole "person" saga, my professor leaving, or even the judo situation got me this worked up. i often say that i am an open book to people close to me, and that hasn't changed. the information in question is known to my closer friends. even then, it took me like 3 years minimum to tell them. the big big problem here is, this person involved in the conflict isn't close to me at all! it pisses me off so bad, knowing that a virtual stranger knows some pretty personal/intimate details. perhaps that was the reason for skype-person's reservations about getting to know me as more than just a screen name. i didn't see it at that time, but i do now.

my usual next step is to ask what can be done to make things better. in this case, that thing would be for that person to forget what they know. but that's impossible. my next best option: that person undergoes a lobotomy or somehow gets amnesia. amnesia can be faked, though, so they'll have to undergo some tests. and by "tests", i mean "batman interrogation techniques". if the person really has forgotten, they will be incapable of giving anything up, even under (extreme) duress. think along the lines of hanging upside down off an overhead bridge, or getting a few joints/bones broken. or maybe they can fake it that well. i don't know, and i wouldn't care by that point. so, yes. i finally understand the whole time machine thing. i'm due to talk to one of my friends, who knows this person, about the whole issue tomorrow. i hope i don't blow up at the wrong person. my friend's innocent, after all.

might be due to this, or the heat, or some other reason, but i haven't been sleeping well. currently averaging about 5 hours a night for the past 3 nights. in a sense it's good, since i get up earlier. should probably try to sleep now, since i have a new morning ritual (pun intended!) to get used to.

-random thought of the day: What a memorable (aka. sucky) first attempt at socializing.-

Given a choice of being let down or led on, i will always choose the former...unless someone can lead me on until i die, which doesn't seem possible. no matter how painful it was at that point in time, at least the hurt doesn't really persist, and the healing process can begin sooner. kind of like ripping the bandage off a wound. being led on results in even more damage, especially when things fall apart, and you realize that a lot of it could have been prevented if the person doing the leading-on had simply been honest with you at the start. so yes. no matter how brutal it is, i will choose to be let down.

that kind of happened tonight, actually. was on a skype call with that person, and they kind of mentioned that they weren't feeling it. "it" being an attraction/desire to know more and take things to the next level. which is ok, i guess...the feeling is there between certain people, and not between others. it does suck on some fundamental level, i'll admit, to hear that the other party isn't feeling things as strongly as you are. but well. at the same time, i also told them to at least give it a try. it's a scientist thing, i guess. i remember a quote from my previous professor - "chemistry" actually means "chem is try". there is a huge difference between no results and no positive results. so, if we do give it a shot, and if things don't work out, i'll probably accept it more readily, as opposed to wondering about the maybes, what-ifs, and all that from not even trying. at the same time, people aren't chemicals. if an experiment fails, it just means that either the reagents aren't reactive enough to react with each other, or the person performing the experiment made a mistake somewhere. for interpersonal relationships, there's always a factor of bias. like, if i have a preconceived notion that interacting with someone is/will be somehow undesirable, i will naturally treat that someone worse than say, my best friend...which makes it kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy in the end.

does love at first sight really exist? let's say you're walking down the street, you lock eyes with someone, and both of you feel a spark. is that really love? i'd say it's more attraction than love. and considering that the phrase is "love at FIRST sight", there's so much you don't know about that person! maybe one of their character traits or habits is a deal breaker? so there really isn't a relationship that's perfect from the get-go; both parties have to work at it. whether it succeeds or not depends on how much both parties are willing to work on it, i think. and this is one of those rare cases where it actually matters who does the work. one partner can't be giving 100% while the other gives 0%. it doesn't average out, unfortunately. both people have to contribute.

i'm actually not sure how things will go from here. sure, i want us to be friends at the very least. i hope that tonight's conversation doesn't/didn't close even that possibility off. people often say, "find a partner who loves you more than you love them". as selfish as it sounds, i can see why. but then, you can't control who you like, right? i guess the logical/practical thing for me to do now would be to move on and search for other fish in the sea, which is so much easier said than done. me and my stupid one person at a time mentality. instead of doing that, i'm going to hold on and wait until the experiment is done to see the result. i guess only then will i be able to move on. but for now, i guess i'll just try to maintain what we have going, and (as stupid/desperate as it sounds,) hope/pray that things will take a turn for the better.

-random thought of the day: What's the similarity between finding a parking lot and finding someone?-

Napoleon (or some other great general-type figure) once said, "there are 2 ways to lead people, either by inspiration, or by fear". at least that's what i remember the principal telling us during one of those morning assembly stories in secondary school. i expect that i messed the quote up and/or attributed it to the wrong person, but i suppose the message is still retained. to rephrase it a bit, you can either encourage people to do something, or scare them into doing it. often times i find that motivation works better, though there are some special people who won't work without a kick to certain parts of their anatomy. anyway. the reason i'm bringing that up is because "meeting" this person kind of gave me that proverbial kick to get into shape.

hang on. let me kind of quantify/explain that bit. it's something which i find not-entirely correct; you shouldn't have to change yourself to suit your partner or someone you're interested in, unless the change improves you in some way. personally for me, i find that as long as everything in my body works as it should (in that i'm healthy most of the time), and as long as it can keep up with what is required of it (daily life, lab work, occasional non-intensive judo), i have no problem with it and am usually happy with what i have. at least i can accept it. but at the same time, other people may not share that view. to be a bit more realistic, people rely on their sense of sight the most. so, first impressions are usually formed based on looks. and i don't suppose many people would fall in like with someone whom they found to look not-nice. i'll have to admit that i am kind of guilty of this too. but somehow, when you perceive your own standard as low, your expectations become correspondingly lower, which is why it usually doesn't show up. and i constantly remind myself to see people for who they are, not how they look, which i hope helps somewhat. of course, i can't expect others to do the same for me, although it would be nice. and i suppose the best friendships happen when people take the effort to look past what's on the surface.

unfortunately, a potential relationship isn't just a friendship. there's more at stake, i think, which is why people are more careful/cautious when it comes to deciding on matters which concern relationships. and i guess it's somewhat similar to a job interview or sales pitch...you want to give the other party (potential employer or maybe business partner) the best impression you can give...without faking anything, of course. that's another thing i have a problem with, artificial people. so i'm not going to pretend to be a morning person, or some other thing which i'm not. at the same time, i think it's beneficial to present the best side first. so in a way, i'm being both motivated and scared into doing something about it, for fear of losing this chance.

previously, i've made several failed attempts to kickstart a physical training regimen. the reason for that is that i lose steam in a couple of weeks or so. excuses come into the picture, like i have lab until late, i'm sore from the previous workout, whatever's convenient. i attribute this constant repeating pattern of trying and failure to 2 major factors (aside from my own laziness): no support, and nothing to work towards. i'm not blaming anyone, since i find that getting fit is a largely individual process. plus, nobody owes me anything, nor do i owe it to anyone to go about doing it. previously, i had short temporary goals, like dan grading. now that most of my goals/targets are not physical-based (and instead, focus on graduating on time), that kind of doesn't give me a reason to work out or stuff like that.

to address these issues, i've been thinking about signing up for a gym membership. yes, i know i can use the NUS gym for free. i've been there to look-see-look-see a few times, and while it's decently equipped, it's lacking in two things - expertise and a sense of community/camaraderie. don't even get me started on the crowds. in there, everyone's doing their own thing, and the reliability of any advice (if anyone bothers to give it) is questionable. NUS doesn't offer a sports science degree, after all, so it's hard to tell who actually knows what they're doing. and given my own half-assed knowledge, i think i'd be better off in the hands of professionals. so far, i've done a bit of research, and i don't think i'll be going for a "traditional" gym, like say, california fitness. i've actually been doing some research on this new (well, not exactly new by now) gym called ritual. it's a pretty interesting concept, revolving around the idea that they eliminate all possible excuses for you to not exercise. for instance, they have showers, so you can work out and leave the place feeling clean. but that's more or less standard in a gym. this place goes above and beyond by even providing exercise attire! and if you think you don't have the time for a session, each session only lasts 30 minutes. so including shower and even an after-workout smoothie, we're looking at like an hour, tops? the only possible excuse you could have is that it's too far, or that you don't feel like training, both of which are pretty non-substantial. if you're making those excuses, you're probably not going to succeed even with the best system in the world.

as you might expect, such a novel concept doesn't come cheap. i sent them an enquiry email a few months back, and got a price list in response to one of my questions. the prices are...kind of scary, to put it mildly. we're looking at above $3000 for a year's membership. sure, it translates to about $300 a month, but the thing is, it's unlimited. means you can go every day, or maybe even more than once a day (though it sounds like just one session will be more than enough to kill you). so assuming a person pays the membership fee and goes for, say, 4 classes a week, that translates to about $17 per class. sounds good, no? there is a cheaper off-peak membership, with more limited training hours. i figure that i can bend my schedule to accommodate their hours. at present, i'm thinking of doing a 6-month off-peak thing, which costs about $1300 paid upfront. apparently there's a discount if the fee is paid up in one shot as opposed to monthly recurring payments. if i go every alternate day (let's be less ambitious first), that will come to...about $15 per class. that's pretty reasonable, i think. there are a few hidden costs, though, in the form of transport costs (the gym is located near clarke quay, so i'll either have to take a train to and fro or park there), after-workout nourishment (slightly more expensive than a regular NUS meal). that's all that comes to mind now, but i wouldn't be surprised if i overlooked something. think i'll send them another email of questions, then arrange for a free one-week trial.

some more developments have come up on the potential-relationship front. i went for a gathering of secondary school friends (touched upon in the last post) and told one of the guys there about it. he thought that nothing would develop, and told me not to invest in it. his exact words, by the way. "invest" here meaning investing my feelings/emotions, and investing myself, too. it's too late, unfortunately. i don't know...how do you chase someone without investing yourself into the process? his advice was to keep it casual, and keep my options open. i see the sense in what he says, but i'm not capable of that somehow. it seems too...flighty/insincere. i'd rather concentrate all my resources on one thing (person, in this case), then move on wholeheartedly to the next thing if the first thing didn't work out. maybe that's why my previous professor said that i wasn't fully utilizing my time. talking with the person in question yesterday was also made me feel a bit conflicted. it's like they're becoming a bit distant. maybe it's their workload, or fatigue. the thing that kind of scares me is that my rational scientist side is raising some alerts that things don't look all that amazing and shiny...namely because that person mentioned going for coffee with someone attractive, which kind of annoyed me. i guess it's my damned fault, because i may have done something similar (introduce another person into the equation) a while ago. fair's fair, i guess. well. i suppose i shouldn't jump to conclusions in the absence of solid evidence. just take it easy and see what fate brings.

-random thought of the day: My resourcefulness scares me sometimes.-

Part of me was thinking of writing this post out, then scanning the pages and uploading them, as i'd done like twice before due to computer-lorry issues. my computer is fine, but somehow, there are some topics about which posts are better written than typed. the feel of the post becomes different, if that even makes any sense. handwriting is more intimate, i guess. but i guess laziness wins out in the end this time, not to mention the convenience of just typing vs. writing, scanning, cropping, and finally uploading. i will do some writing soon, though. feels like i need to exercise my penmanship muscles.

i have 3 prompts to clear. let's start with car. brief recap: i had a mental slip and hit the front of the car into a pillar in a multi-storey carpark which i'd been to countless times before. so i decided to get the whole front bumper replaced, since there were a few other existing scratches there already. and at the same time, i decided to change the license plate to a one-line one too. the annoying thing was that as i was sending the car into the workshop on monday before my flight, i scraped the bottom right side against a low-lying water main, causing more scratches. in my defence, it was dark and the water main was placed in an inconspicuous corner, which was in shadow. since i was already at the workshop, i asked them to fix it as well. fast-forward 10-ish days, and i went to collect it. as you know from the last post, i had to wait an hour for them to be done with other customers first. bear in mind that i went half an hour after they opened, and already had such a long wait. looks like i'd better call ahead for an appointment after the servicing which i intend to do there in august or so. i wouldn't complain about waiting time normally, but i was really in a rush. at least the wait was worth it. the car looks amazing! still getting used to the license plate, but overall i'm satisfied. the boss did tell me that there were some problems with the car, namely the engine mount (which another mechanic also highlighted before) and a bushing or bearing of some sort (new info). looks like the next servicing might cost me a bit more than normal. in fact, this session already cost more than normal. guess quality comes with a price, and singapore's best honda mechanic naturally commands a premium. it's to the extent where he charges GST, which means he earns $1 million in annual revenue or something like that. well, i guess it's somewhat reassuring (and painful on the wallet) to know that the car is in good hands.

the past weekend was quite eventful, in that my friend and his fiancee, his brother and his girlfriend, another friend and i all got together for bowling. still managed to hold my own, though i'm far from the best. interestingly, the brother's girlfriend is my primary school friend's sister. how much of a coincidence is that!? i like hanging out with this group of friends. it's amazing that we've managed to keep in contact since post-secondary school days. this coming saturday, they're setting something up with schoolmates whom i haven't met since sec 4 graduation, so...11-ish years. i THINK things should be ok.

minor change. due to some new developments, i'm not going to say much about the relationship issue. well, it's not exactly a relationship issue. more like a potential-relationship issue. to put it in a nutshell, we're getting closer after a minor rough spot yesterday. fingers crossed the upward trend maintains. we're scarily alike! i think this might be the one...provided we iron out our individual issues first. as the other person is fond of telling me, we'll see. have to play it cool and not be overly-attached. sounds like a plan.

-random thought of the day: Housekeeping check tomorrow.-

Back in lab for the first time in 2 weeks! well, i did come back for a little while to drop some souvenirs off last friday, but that doesn't really count since i didn't do any lab work. spent today doing a couple of work-ups and setting a new reaction. quite slack, by all accounts. also spent some time with my new minion, aka. honours student. i think we'll get along decently enough. expecting the pace to pick up a bit as the days go by, but for today and tomorrow at least, it's just reacclimatization.

now, about japan. in general, it was good for the most part. the company was mostly nice, food was amazing, sights were really something to behold. i guess that makes it a successful holiday by my measure. there were some things i wasn't really happy about, but i guess that they're more easily overlooked now that the whole trip's over. similar to last time, i think i'll try to do a semi-chronological thing.

my previous trips were either scheduled when i was on holiday, or when i had ample time to pack. this time...not so much. it's probably the most unprepared i've been for an overseas trip. i was so angry with myself for forgetting multiple things! like after i dropped the car off at the workshop, i realized that i'd left my phone cable or something inside, so my friend made a u-turn and i went to retrieve it. then, when we were at the airport parking lot, i realized that i'd forgotten my carry-on bag. worst thing is that it's not some small bag; it's big enough to hold 2 judo gi, a first-aid kit, and still have room to spare! can you even imagine how much of a moron i felt at that time!? ok, granted that there was barely anything in it at that time, and it was stuffed way back into the boot to make space for my main luggage. BUT STILL. such moron. had to inconvenience my friend further and ask him to go back once again to get the bag. it's my ridiculous good fortune that he's so patient. if i'm ever caught in a similar situation as the driver, i'll have to remember what he did for me, and be more forgiving. even then, it turns out that i still forgot my wallet (left it in the centre console of the car, which was covered). but no big deal, since i transferred my money and ID to my usual pouch-type thing for overseas use. i'd lose my EZ-link card and some other less important membership cards at most.

thankfully, we made it to the airport on time, and the rest of the flight process was rather painless, as was going to osaka and checking in. didn't really do much on the first day, since we were rather tired from almost 15 hours of travel. the second day was USJ day, and probably the highlight of the trip for me. went on the hollywood dream ride, and the backdrop, which was basically the backwards version of the hollywood dream. it was quite thrilling, especially since i hadn't been on a rollercoaster since...primary school? yes, i didn't have a childhood. oddly, the front-facing version felt more terrifying. maybe because we could see what was coming up next. the rest of the place was equally amazing, with various interesting attractions. the few that stood out to me were backdraft (a chemical plant catching fire...safety officer's worst nightmare), back to the future, spiderman, the entire harry potter place, minion mart, and the shark from jaws. was definitely worth visiting.

the next day was osaka aquarium and osaka castle. the aquarium was bigger than i'd thought, and had more than just fish and sea life. there were penguins and otters, for instance. and a huge scary-looking whale shark with the almost too-cute name of yuu-chan. oh, and a mola mola! it's real! i've got a pretty nice photo of my virtual fish alongside the description of its real-life counterpart, but it's in my friend's camera. towards the end of the aquarium walk, there was something like an underwater petting zoo, where they let us touch manta rays and (baby) sharks. quite interesting. since i'm not a diver, and have no intention to be, i guess that's the closest i'll get to deep-sea wildlife. osaka castle was just...big and grand. i guess if you've seen one japanese castle, you've seen them all. i don't regret going, though. got to meet a man with a trained falcon. i was quite afraid to take a photo with it due to the close proximity and the chance of losing an eye or something, but amazement eventually won out.

i think kyoto day 1 followed that. we went to arashiyama bamboo grove and fushimi-inari shrine. been to the latter, but not the former. the only (literal and metaphorical) damper that day was that it was raining. it was mostly a drizzle, but somehow, having to juggle an umbrella along with everything else was rather annoying. the bamboo grove was quite peaceful/tranquil, except for a horde of tourists. i'll leave you to guess where they were from. in addition to the aforementioned locations, we also went to see togetsukyo bridge, where i took some quite nice photos, and shigeharu knife shop, where my friend bought a nice hand-made knife. the guy even carved? hammered? my friend's name into the side of the blade. and since i was there, and since it was a rare opportunity, i got one too...with my name, even! call me stupid or whatever, but some chances come along only so often, and they should be seized. interestingly, that's something i want to elaborate on eventually. last item on that day's agenda was the legendary omurice. we walked 2km in the rain, lugging our purchases. took us about 40 minutes? so, so painful. the meal kind of made up for it, though the chef was rather grumpy and short because we arrived too early for our reservation. by some stroke of luck, the previous group was a no-show, so we got moved up. i talked to him for a bit, and picked up a few tips on making a nice omelette. i think my problem is that i don't have the right pan, and that my heat control is off. well, just have to keep working at it.

day 4 was nara day. since i'd been there before, i didn't really find it all that fascinating. deer were still cute, temple was still grand. we went back early to do some laundry and housekeeping. i think that this was easily our least eventful/most slack day, but it was a good break in the pace.

kyoto day 2 was on the schedule for day 5. we went to kinkaku-ji and kiyomizu-dera. been to the latter, not the former. the golden temple really lives up to its name. it's definitely worth at least one visit. only minor downer was the sheer amount of people. think there were a few tour groups there, which really caused congestion. and it was sunday. kiyomizu-dera was basically the same. as is my practice, i wrote an ema (small wooden plaque), wishing for happiness in general, and someone's happiness in particular. if things don't work out with this someone as well, i'll have to stop this habit, since my relationship with the previous person about whom i wrote imploded quite badly. we'll see. there was supposed to be a hot spring trip after the temples, but certain delays in schedule, plus another factor (which i'll talk about later) resulted in the idea being scrapped and us going to nishiki market instead. it was crowded. really crowded. but the thing is, japanese crowds are so much more tolerable! everyone does their best not to be a nuisance, unlike some people in singapore.

that wraps up the osaka portion. we took the shinkansen to tokyo on monday, and went to asakusa. as is my habit, i prayed and asked for a fortune at sensou-ji. the fortune was something like "delayed luck", which means that things will go my way, but probably not so soon. sounds about right, actually. headed to ikebukuro for the pokemon centre, where i managed to get my friend's pikachu-in-charizard. we met another friend of ours (who was supposed to be on the exact same trip as us, but got his feelings cheated) for dinner. i wanted to go to jomon, which is a rather popular izakaya, but some people didn't want to wait and didn't like the cramped space inside. so we all ended up eating at this other place, and i then separated from the group and went back to jomon for seconds. food was nice, but on the expensive side. would probably go back again despite the prices.

tsukiji on the morning of day 7! we got up at 5:45am, and got there at about 6:30am. sushi dai (supposedly the go-to place for good sushi) was already packed, with a queue going around the corner. not wanting to queue, we settled for another place selling seafood donburi. it was still ridiculously fresh and tasted great, but a small part of me still wonders whether queueing for sushi would have been worth it. i suppose i should be content with my lot, and perhaps plan better so that i can go for sushi on my next trip. following breakfast, we went to the kodokan, where we dropped in on the international department and gave them some omiyage before going to the museum. it's really a treasure trove of judo knowledge and rare items of historical significance. too bad photo-taking is prohibited inside. from here on, it was mostly shopping at ameyoko, which was rather uneventful.

wednesday was more shopping. i decided to break off from the rest, and went to the meiji shrine instead. was nice to finally get some alone-time and be around nature. it was raining again, but super super lightly. could have gone without an umbrella, but i didn't really want to risk falling sick in a foreign country. those 5-ish hours of me-time really helped to recharge my introvert batteries. and i got many nice scenic photos, which was an added bonus. finished off the day with a little tax-free shopping, in the form of a new phone case and cable. should have gotten another, shorter one as well. but well, i'll make do.

our last day was more or less last-minute packing, going to the airport, and catching our flight. rather routine stuff. thankfully, my mind focused that day, and i didn't forget anything. reached singapore in one piece, as did my luggage (which is on its last legs/wheels), and the box which i checked in. yes, apparently a box can not only be checked in, it can survive loading and unloading too! learnt something new. decided to overnight in the airport. figured that it would save taxi fare since i had to pick the car up at ubi the next morning. went to get the car, where i was made to wait for AN HOUR, then rushed off to distribute souvenirs, and to BPS for judo after that. so that about wraps up the details of the japan trip. i'll blog about this past weekend separately.

now, to conduct an AAR. like i said earlier, i enjoyed myself for the most part. but there were a few things that made me feel...less than happy. one thing was one of my friends, who backtracked on his decision to go to the hot spring when he found out it was clothes banned, and not clothes optional. now...it's not like i particularly enjoy nudism or anything (nothing to show off), but when in rome, right? so i was kind of annoyed that he didn't want to experience the local culture. but then, it's completely his choice, so i couldn't have forced him.

the next thing links back to my lesson from last time - when in doubt about someone, don't travel with them. this group comprised 4 guys (including myself) and a girl. the guys were easygoing enough, but the girl was a bit...difficult to handle. i respect her as someone senior to me, but sometimes, the way she said certain things really got on my nerves. i mean, teasing/joking is fine and all, but there were times where i thought that she was being unnecessarily mean. perhaps we just don't click well. that extends to our travel styles, too. for me, i'm ok with getting lost once in a while, or being a bit late, provided it doesn't mess up any reservations. for her, everything had to be precision-planned, and all the background research had to be done beforehand. was a little extreme for my liking. so, lesson learnt (again). i guess the maximum i can go with her is 5 days, and definitely not just the both of us. there definitely has to be some people to act as a buffer, or i might just lose it.

oddly though, i found myself getting a bit homesick towards the end of the trip. and bearing in mind how much i love japan, it's really REALLY odd. is it a case of being outside the comfort zone too long? or did i simply want the trip to end because i was getting too irritated with the people? i really don't know. but well, now that i'm back in singapore, most of the negative feelings have evaporated.

last point: my japanese language ability. it's true...language is a use-it-or-lose-it thing. i've deproved so much! basically i'm reverting to simple grammar patterns to express myself. fortunately, they still work. luckily, my listening is still reasonably ok, and i understand the keigo forms, which made things a bit easier.

to end off, i have the perfect theme song for this trip. here it is:

Simple Plan (ft. Taka) - Summer Paradise
Oh la da da da da
Yeah me and you in summer paradise

My heart is sinking as I’m lifted
Up above the clouds away from you
And I can’t believe I’m leaving
Oh I don’t kno-kno-know what I’m gonna do

But someday, I will find my way back to
Where your name is written in the sand

'Cause I remember every sunset (I remember)
I remember every word you said
We were never gonna say goodbye (goodbye)
Singing la da da da da
Tell me how to get back to (back to)
Back to summer paradise with you
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)
I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(And I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)

My soul is broken, streets are frozen
I can’t stop these feelings melting through
And I’d give away a thousand days, oh
Just to have another one with you (with you)

Where real life can wait (real life can wait)
We’re crashing like waves (crashing like waves)
Playing in the sand (playing in the sand)
Holding your hand

'Cause I remember every sunset (I remember)
I remember every word you said
We were never gonna say goodbye (goodbye)
Singing la da da da da
Tell me how to get back to (back to)
Back to summer paradise with you
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)
I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(And I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)

My memories are reminding me
The perfect night on the perfect beach
あの日の記憶をかき集めたとこで戻れやしない
The season's not the reason why
I fell in love with you in paradise
君が僕を思い出すたびに
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat

Someday, I will find my way back to
Where your name is written in the sand

'Cause I remember every sunset (I remember)
I remember every word you said
We were never gonna say goodbye (goodbye, goodbye)
Singing la da da da da
Tell me how to get back to (back to)
Back to summer paradise with you
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat

I remember when we first kissed
How I didn’t wanna leave your lips
And how I’ve never ever felt so high (so high)
Singing la da da da da
Tell me how to get back to (back to)
Back to summer paradise with you
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(And I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)
And I’ll be there in a heartbeat
(And I’ll be there, I’ll be there, I’ll be there)
I’ll be there in a heartbeat

-random thought of the day: Coming up next post...car, relationship, weekend.-