Journalling and blogging are essentially the same thing - recording things that happened, and your thoughts about those things. the obvious difference is that journalling is done with pen and paper, while blogging involves typing on a computer and publishing your thoughts to the internet. i'm sure you could journal on a computer too, just save your writing as text files. that doesn't count as blogging, since "blog" is derived from "weblog", ie. there's an element of internet in it. sorry for the sudden history lesson. given that the purpose of journalling and blogging is exactly the same, you'd think that there wouldn't be much difference between the two, right? that's what i thought as well, until i tried keeping a journal in perth, writing in the same style as i would use when blogging. i mean, the process is essentially the same, except for one significant thing that kind of threw me off at the start - there are no backspace or delete buttons when writing with pen and paper. so that means if i make a spelling mistake, i have to cancel the wrong word out and rewrite the correct word. not the most difficult thing in the world, but it makes the overall page look less neat. maybe that's why i prefer writing in pencil sometimes? the more important thing to me is that if i forget to write about something, or want to reorder the sequence of things i'd written about, there's no such thing as copy and paste, or repositioning the cursor and hitting enter a few times to make space in earlier parts of the post/entry. all in all, i think i prefer blogging to journalling. journalling after every day is useful though, particularly if you're on a long-ish holiday. recording the memories while they are most vivid and all. perhaps i'll do point form next time. which reminds me, i have to refill my pen before jakarta. alternatively, i could write on my tablet. that would give me somewhat of a backspace/delete function since i can move the written text around. maybe i'll try that for jakarta instead.

the original intention was to scan/photograph the pages from my notebook (see? i'm starting to use them!) and upload them here. but i eventually decided against it. instead, i'm going to use them as references for when we did which activity. will probably omit the nitty-gritty stuff, since i foresee this post being long enough, and I STILL HAVE TO PACK FOR JAKARTA! but it should be fine. worst case i don't sleep that early (or at all) tonight.

somehow, the journey to perth was a little less smooth/pleasant than my usual travelling experience. for one, i got to the airport later than usual, though still in good time for my flight. the automated check-in machine rejected my passport, so i had to go to the counter to ask for help. turns out that the flight was almost full, and the only seats left were on the emergency exit row. since they had to assess whether passengers were physically capable of opening the emergency exit, the system could not allocate the seat to me automatically. so that turned out to be a blessing in disguise due to the extra legroom that came with those seats. i also wanted to buy some duty-free sake to take over to share with my gaming friend who's studying there, but apparently there's this rule that all alcohol had to be purchased a minimum of 90 minutes before flights to australia and the US. guess who didn't know about that rule? so that didn't work out either. as i would later find out, it not working out was actually for the better as well. the flight was ok, except for a family of 3 generations also heading to perth. i was seated beside the grandparents, while the parents and grandkids were in the middle row. being under 5 years old, the grandkids didn't know how to equalize the pressure in their ears at takeoff and landing, which i imagine led to some distress as they were crying non-stop. i just bore with it, though i really think that kids under the age of 8 should not be allowed on airplanes, or in public, if i'm feeling particularly cranky that day. the flight was rather uneventful, with several bouts of turbulence, but we made it to perth. spent a while in the duty free shop, then met my cousin who'd came to pick me up. we got back to her place, where her husband had cooked dinner! it was delicious, as were all of my subsequent meals there. the first night was quite relaxed, we just spent hours talking and catching up, and made some plans for the next few days.

my cousin had taken a couple of days' leave for my visit, so my sightseeing from saturday to monday was accompanied by her and her husband. we went to kings park, elizabeth quay, swan valley (where i bought chocolates for hand-made truffle experimentation), cottesloe beach, and scitech in those 3 days. did a lot of walking, too! i think i hit my step target pretty consistently. there was one day i did more than 15000 steps, which is now an all-time record for me. i generally find australia to be more relaxed than singapore...then again, very few places aren't. people are generally more friendly, and it's not uncommon to have pleasant small talk or a short polite conversation with cashiers, receptionists, and other service staff. the sights were great, too. most big australian cities (perth included) are located on the coast of the continent, so there are great sea views everywhere. i think we had a good balance of natural and man-made attractions on our itinerary.

i was pretty much solo for tuesday and wednesday. on tuesday, i went to explore the city myself, where i had ramen for lunch (i know right!? who goes to australia for ramen?), and saw the perth mint and st. mary's cathedral. the mint was nice, specializing in gold. being more of a platinum person, i asked if they did anything in platinum, and apparently they did, but only once a year...just to show that they still could. i also met my online gaming friend for dinner. we had earlier met on saturday, and i passed him the stuff that i'd got for him at the duty free shop. i hope that i'm just being extra sensitive, but i kind of noticed that he wasn't very keen on meeting me after the first time. like, before the trip, he was all excited, saying that he'd take me to so many places, and that i could sleep over at his place for a few nights. but after that first meeting, he was saying that his relatives visited unexpectedly, and that he had to rush some work for his classes. while those things are most likely true, it's the way he delivered the message that gave me the impression that he wasn't very interested to spend time with me. thank goodness i wasn't reliant on him having space and time for me. the bright side is that we ate at this japanese place called edosei, as in edo (tokyo) city. easily the best restaurant meal i had in perth, with a price tag to match! it's probably the best japanese food i've had outside of japan, actually. if i do go back to perth, that's definitely on my list of places to go. wednesday was a rest day, which i spent rotting at home and recovering from all the walking. i think i paced this holiday quite well, such that it was relaxing, but not boring.

we went to chemist's warehouse on thursday, to get some supplements at a huge discount. it's in line with my gym and healthy eating plans, more or less. i've never felt more like an auntie than when i was comparing prices and quantities of active ingredients across brands. in the end, i ended up spending enough to qualify for a GST refund, so that gives you some idea of how much i stocked up on. we then had lunch at a little cafe in east perth, then took a walk at a nearby park to see a newly-finished bridge. i think living in australia would be better for my health overall, since it seems that people are quite physically active. like my cousin was telling me how there was a running fad, then a cycling fad at her workplace. it's progressing to canoeing now, i think. and the weather was so much nicer there. a little too cold at night, but i never felt tired when walking. seems less dusty too, and my allergies didn't act up at all. of course, australia has its own problems. drug use and homelessness were two of the issues that were highlighted during my stay there, as there happened to be a 3-part TV special on homelessness. not saying that these problems don't exist in singapore either, especially with my recent conversations with people who had had drug use experience, but i think it's less prevalent here.

friday was another slack day, and i took a walk around the suburb to a cafe which my cousin recommended. i've noticed that quite a few cafes actually have bookshelves, where you can take books off to read as you have your drink or meal. guess it's another example of the different/slower pace of life. you'd hardly find that in singapore; most places are looking to maximize turnover to generate revenue. i had gypsy eggs (poached eggs in a spicy chickpea sauce), accompanied by wolverine: origins (the comic, not some fancy drink). i do find it a bit of a waste that i don't really drink coffee in a country with such a strong cafe/coffee culture. just imagine - starbucks couldn't get a foothold there. that meal was followed by a walk to the nearby grocery store. for a neighbourhood grocery store, it was really well-stocked! i notice that compared to singaporean grocery stores, there seems to be a larger proportion of fresh produce in australian grocery stores and supermarkets, and it's priced cheaper, too! yet another reason why i'd like it there.

final bits of sightseeing on saturday and sunday before flying back on sunday night. saturday was fremantle day! we went to the fremantle market, where lots of artisinal stuff was on sale. got tempted by a gorgeous leather-bound journal, but it was simply too beautiful for me. like, if i bought it, i wouldn't dare to write in it. my cousin-in-law got a belt, which apparently was their first purchase in the fremantle market since moving to perth 6 years ago. he says that most belts are too long for him, since he's naturally skinny without working out or really watching his food intake. i'm so ridiculously envious of him, it's not funny. also on saturday, there was rugby - australia vs new zealand. since we were in australia, i'm sure you can guess who we were cheering on. that's right, new zealand! i may have (intentionally) neglected to mention that both my hosts are new zealand citizens. thankfully, the all blacks won, which was kind of a nice ending to a great holiday for me. sunday was spent packing, with lunch at kuza, a japanese place at which my cousin and cousin-in-law are regular enough to have their usual orders. the after-lunch walk was around a dog park and bird sanctuary, which made for several nice pictures. then, back home for a few hours to pack and make sure that i didn't forget anything, before they sent me to the airport and i flew back. reached singapore at 1:30am, which is not really the best time to land since most things are closed and it severely and adversely affects my bedtime.

all in all, it was a good experience. i'm really grateful to chemical engineer cousin and her husband, who went above and beyond in their capacity as hosts. i think it was the exact kind of stress-free, easygoing holiday that i needed. i feel quite happy, which i hope will last for a few weeks/months in colder, more pragmatic singapore. to forecast future events, i'm flying to jakarta tomorrow, for a week. nearly forgot to buy travel insurance, but a message from my cousin jolted my memory. so that's been settled. unlike last time, i don't think i have any side quests (aka. things to get for people back home), unless my (other) cousin-in-law wants something from there. will probably end up getting something for malaysian person, though. i do know another thing that they want, so i have to arrange the logistics of that, too. thankfully it's something that can be found in singapore. i'm hoping that the visit did them some good. we just had a phone conversation earlier, and i think that they're willing to let us become more than friends? then again, i'm horribly biased as far as this interaction is going. i think that there is potential, but i'm just going to have to work harder at it. have to remind myself that we're still not committed yet. in fact, our relationship status is still a little fuzzy. let's see how that changes in the upcoming weeks.

-random thought of the day: Get packing!-

Going to save the post on perth for tomorrow, because (1) i'm tired and am in no mental condition to write such a long post as it will require, (2) something major happened yesterday/today, and that's occupying most of my mental resources now. as you may recall, i've been texting this malaysian person, who is not the same malaysian person as the one who came down to singapore during CNY. that feels like a lifetime away. confusing, right? anyway, the current malaysian person was feeling a little down about their situation. admittedly, life has been rather harsh to them in recent weeks. not going to elaborate too much because of privacy concerns, but the best word i'd use to describe their attitude yesterday is "绝望", which kind of translates to a mix of "despair" and "resignation" to me, with a hint of "helplessness". "望" means to look at something far away, and "绝" has the connotation of ending. so it's like not looking to the future any more. you know, the whole "i'm tired of my life" kind of thing. i was texting them on and off throughout the day, amidst picking up my aunt (chemical engineer cousin's mother) and dropping her off, and getting needles stuck in me for TCM. seems that while my right knee is now ok, secondary injuries have manifested in my right ankle and left lower leg as a result of them compensating for the knee as it recovered.

throughout the texting, i was getting increasingly worried, to the point where i considered driving into malaysia to see them. there were two major issues with that plan, though. i've never driven into malaysia ever, and the last time i'd been to malaysia was literally 20 years ago, in primary 4. i don't really consider the 2 JC NYAA trips, because we largely didn't interact with anyone/anything else until we got to our destination. i called upon almost every resource at my disposal - my aunt (to borrow ringgit and the tap-and-go card), my insurance agent (to check that my policy still covered me in malaysia), and scary JC friend (to get a better idea of immigration procedures and driving to malaysia). the prospect of driving in was becoming more bleak, not helped at all by my aunt telling me horror stories of her friend getting robbed at knife-point in a shopping mall toilet. in the end, i didn't use any of the aforementioned resources. salvation came in the form of my big brother figure, who was going in that night to visit the water park in desaru the next day (ie. today). he suggested that he take me to malaysian person's place, before he left us alone. and in the event that malaysian person was unwilling/unable to spend time with me, i'd have his friend's place to stay at as a backup. even now, more than a day later, i still don't know what possessed me to go along with that plan. thanks to their help, i made it across the causeway and to JB sentral mall, where they called a grab and accompanied me to malaysian person's house. i should mention that i wanted to save the $12 from activating an overseas data passport, and my friend had mentioned that i could leech on his hotspot anyway. so, there was a brief period of time, less than an hour, when i was not connected to the internet. as murphy's law would have it, that person tried to call me in that time. let's just say a massive freakout happened while i was offline, and i came back to quite a few messages delivered through several avenues of communication, becoming increasingly panicked over time. that left me with no choice but to give the plan away, to reassure them that i was still there and still concerned for them. my friends booked a grab to malaysian person's place. it was cheap (RM25 for a 30km-ish drive), but the ride wasn't exactly smooth. we were in a honda fit, which is not the best car to transport 4 larger guys (including the driver). the suspension was bad too, and there were at least 5 occasions where the car kind of lurched as we went over potholes or similar on the road. but well, wasn't expecting too much, and at least we got there quickly.

we finally reached malaysian person's house at about 2:00am. cutting out the less important bits, i gave malaysian person some stuff i bought for them in perth, we talked for a bit at a nearby 24-hour mcdonalds, then ended up in a hotel room at close to 4:00am. there wasn't any ulterior motive to getting a hotel room, just that they couldn't have me stay over at their house because their brother-in-law was home. considering the lateness of everything that happened, we slept in until...10:30am-ish, then lazed in bed until checkout time at noon. not a bad way to spend a night with someone, i think. after the checkout, malaysian person was still nice enough to take me to lunch, then to the JB customs and immigration place as i had to be back in singapore early for a workshop in the evening. the immigration was oddly symmetric, and left me a bit disoriented as to whether i was exiting or entering malaysia again. i managed to retrace my steps from the previous night, and made it back home with a couple hours to spare before the workshop.

while the trip was fulfilling, and may result in a potential date or partner, i have to admit that i was more scared of travelling to malaysia than i was of travelling to uzbekistan. i guess it's the solo factor - i was counting on having to drive in alone, while i had people travelling with me to uzbekistan, and friends who had been there before. i just hope that i was able to shine a ray of light into the gloom, and that the souvenirs will do their part in that regard too. i'm hopeful, because a repeat visit is in the works, so that means that the chance to progress this...relationship? interaction? is still there. just hoping that i won't get ghosted.

-random thought of the day: Stay positive.-

A few posts ago, i was deliberating the need for sunblock for swimming. it turns out that the answer to my question of "do i need sunblock while swimming?" is a huge emphatic YES, as my sunburnt shoulders and back would attest to as well. i suppose i was a little too smart, by deciding to test the hypothesis at 12:00pm, when the sun is typically the strongest. there was some cloud cover, which made me think that i could get away with it. the sun didn't think so, though. well...it isn't too bad, i think. just redness so far. hoping that i skip the peeling phase, because i don't want to leave dead skin deposits at my cousin's place. think it'll be fine since it's been close to 36 hours and the pain's been bearable so far. i notice it the most when i roll my shoulders. nothing i can't stand. how far i've come since my first sunburn at 9 years old! then again, i don't think i've been sunburned more than 5 times in my life...which is already 5 or less times too many. anyway, i got sunblock which is supposedly water-resistant. scary JC friend says it's no use for swimming, so in addition to that, i have to choose my swimming times better. swimming itself was...ok. i swam for an hour and 20 minutes or so, with no/minimal (less than 30 seconds) stop between lengths. each length of the pool took me 2 to 3 minutes. yes, i know i'm slow. but as i was telling my friend online, it's literally been more than 10 years since i've swam. so cut me some slack! i think it's a good-ish start, though...so at least that's something going my way.

went to giant tampines after swimming. bought a salmon, some broccoli, and a head of cabbage. i realize that the nice fish people will cut up your chosen fish, so it saves some hassle. i personally wouldn't mind filleting the fish myself, but the descaling is another matter. and since they provide the service, why not? it's actually quite different, buying from giant vs. NTUC or cold storage. there's more of a wet market feel, i think? the latter two are more atas in my perception. cooking was fairly easy too. just cook the broccoli for about 10-15 minutes in salted boiling water, then remove and let the cabbage go for about half an hour. add the salmon in the last 15 minutes, and season with soy sauce, a touch of vinegar, pepper, and any other herbs/spices that you may like or have on hand. i like it, but i'm biased towards my own cooking.

also sent scary JC friend to the airport yesterday, which was also when i asked her about the sunblock. she's going to australia this trip, and will be going to the US at the end of the month. with my own travel schedule, i don't think i'll see her for another 6 to 8 weeks after yesterday. i'll miss her. granted, we've gone for longer with no contact, but it's different. if we're both in singapore, i'd have the reassurance of her being available for dinner or drinks within the next few days, if not on the night of me calling her. that's not exactly possible when we're separated by a few megametres. well...she'll be back eventually. in the meantime, i promised her to not chat up any weirdos.

TCM today was...different. my usual physician was away, so another physician did the acupuncture for me. the needles hurt less, but my leg is still feeling sore even hours after the treatment. that's not happened before. maybe i need to sleep it off. hope the positive effects kick in before tuition tomorrow, or at least before i fly. the good news is that my knee is more or less normal now. perth will be a good stress test for it. as for my ankle, i hope it holds out. worst case i'll have to have yet another TCM appointment when i come back.

can't remember if i wanted to blog about anything else. if i did, i guess i'll add on here.

-random thought of the day: Was told to be mentally prepared.-

Compared with saturday, yesterday was a much more trying day, though there was one bright spot, which i'll cover in good time.

managed to make it down to bedok mall to see the samsung shop people. apparently, my screen suffered what's called "burn-in", which leaves persistently-used pixels less active and looking duller. it wouldn't be in issue if all the pixels burned in at the same rate, since the screen would still look consistent. the nice guy at the service desk told me that it can happen if the phone is used while charging (due to the excess heat generated), or if an image is displayed for too long/often on the screen. based on that info, my educated guess is that this happened because i quite frequently watch youtube in the mornings before removing the charger. and it's only been...6 months or less! never had that happen to my note 5...i wonder if they changed the OLED formulation. the guy also told me that the only way to fix the problem would be to replace the screen. it would take 3-4 days if i sent the phone in right then at bedok mall, but only 1-2 days if i went down to the service centres at westgate, plaza singapura, or vivocity. vivo it is, then. but i'll probably do it after all the travelling. feels less rushed. good thing is that repairs are probably covered by warranty, so it's just minor inconvenience for a few days. am thinking of bringing the note 5 down too, just to get a price quote. the warranty period for that is long over, so i just hope that it won't exceed $250. if it does, then i guess i'll just ask them to wipe the data and have a very expensive paperweight, or sell it for parts.

tuition proceeded as normal. i think VS boy knows the content, just have to get him to be better at recognizing what the question wants, to be less afraid of tacking data-response questions, and to be more careful when answering questions in general. i personally don't think an A2 is out of reach for him. just have to see him through another 2+ months. one thing about him that impresses me is that he is pretty hardworking. like, he went to the extent of making his own notes for organic chem and electrolysis, with other chapters in the works. i'm also happy that his parents (well, his mother, at least) is supportive and cooperative. completely stress-free assignment. the only stress i face is getting a parking lot. for some reason, very few visitor lots are available whenever i go over. think because the carpark is located reasonably close to bedok mall.

went to drop off the keys to the training venue for the kurash people, then drove down to lab to clear my chemicals, print some documents, and take my box back. sometime between submitting my thesis and yesterday, they deactivated my student card. not sure which triggered the deactivation, thesis submission or candidature expiration. that meant i didn't have access to the lab, and was locked out. luckily, one of my juniors came back to work, and let me in. i had a surprisingly large number of feelings regarding my access getting revoked. after the initial shock wore off, there was mild annoyance, but mostly relief. it was also a little bittersweet, i guess, because it's another sign that i'm getting distant from the lab. but at the same time, it's a sign of progress! i should feel happy about that, at least. cleared up my chemicals, then rotted a while before loading the box into the car. it's next to me right now; i started unpacking it a little. although i did one round of waste disposal in lab while packing the box, i may need to do a second round now. maybe tonight, while cleaning the room. i realized that my notebook collection grew AGAIN, because of those free sample notebooks that chemical companies provide, as well as some notebooks which i've been using to take notes during conversations with my professor and stuff like that. very sure that the total number of notebooks has hit double digits. and don't even get me started on post-its. on the bright side, it means that i won't run out of writing paper anytime soon.

dinner was at west coast plaza, with the photocopy shop auntie and uncle from NUS. they were there for years 1 to 3 of my undergrad, but left at the start of my honours year. since then, we've kept in sporadic contact. you know, the usual liking each other's posts on facebook, the odd comment now and then. in the past 5 years, i've met up with them a grand total of 3 times. first time was at tiong bahru plaza in 2013 (we remembered because i had just got the car a few days prior to that meeting), next was at lavender street in...2014 or 2015, when we still had a judo program there. and the third time was yesterday. to be honest, i'm not sure how or why we've kept in contact even after so long. i guess it's because we see something good in each other, that makes this friendship worth maintaining? we don't get any benefits from each other either, so there's that to consider too. over about 2 hours, we had almost nonstop conversation, catching up on each other's lives and just generally talking. i told them about the grad study journey, the ex, and about this new person whom i'm talking to. the common factor between all 3 of them is that they're malaysian, uncle and auntie updated me about their lives too, including a near-death experience in 2015. something about tumours, but thankfully everything was benign, and a full recovery was made. they also said that if things worked out between us, they'd like to meet this new person. considering that my first meet-up with that person is only scheduled to happen in september (mainly due to my travelling), i don't know when i'll be ready or able to introduce them to anyone.

after i got home last night, that person messaged to say that we should stop contact. they were feeling unsure, i guess, and wanted to protect themself from potential heartbreak. coupled with fatigue, that led to thoughts running astray. we had a long phone conversation, and i think i reassured them somewhat. their character is seriously attractive. the first adjective i'd use to describe them is "considerate". don't want to hope for too much right now, especially since we're currently in different countries. let's see how things pan out. we're still in regular text contact, plus whatsapp calls are data-based, so that's a plus especially since i'm travelling around. i've got ideas about what to do for our first meet-up/"date", but that will have to wait. some parts of the plan can't be done until a few more weeks have passed.

right now, i think i'll just take each day as it comes. there's not much i can do with regards to the person now anyway. if we'd started talking 2 months earlier, i would have postponed my trips not had this scheduling conflict in the first place! as for my remaining time in singapore, the most pressing item on my agenda now is to PACK! i'm still at 0% completeness, but that should change quite rapidly over the next couple of days. or rather, it will have to, if i want to go to australia well-prepared. apart from that, still have to go swimming and grocery shopping today. that's set for the evening, since the pool opened late today (and because i was mildly lazy in the morning). spend a total of about 2 hours in safra tampines (6:00pm to 8:00pm), then go shopping at giant tampines. lucky they open till midnight. even when i went the previous time close to 7:00pm, there was still a decent variety of food available. i could get used to a life like this...except that i need a source of income too. i don't quite dare to count how much money i've gone through in the past 7 months. the sum's definitely gone up from my previous estimate of $500 per month on average in may/june. but well...money problems shouldn't cause me too much worry, i think. after all, earning money is easy compared to earning health and fitness. which reminds me again. swimming in another 3-ish hours.

-random thought of the day: 90+ hours to go!-

Extremely pleased with myself today! got most of my errands done (though i did forget one), and made it home literal moments before it started to rain. so now i'm showered and feeling fresh while blogging in the comfort of my room, which makes me even happier. there's something comforting to me about being indoors while inclement weather goes on outside. might be because it's safe indoors, which makes me feel protected and cozy. and no, it's not because i'm gloating at the people who are outside and stuck in the horrible weather.

should we do a recap first, or blog about today first? recap is shorter, so let's go with that. i went to give some documents to the mechanic for the insurance claim. it's taking FOREVER. managed to speak on the phone to the nice lawyer handling my case, and he further told me that it wouldn't be settled so quickly. sigh. i'm supposed to meet him sometime next week to sign some form or another, so that's one more item on the agenda. hoping that everything goes smoothly. while the ideal/best-case scenario is them ruling 100% in my favour (meaning that i don't have to pay anything), i'll accept anything upwards of 70% as reasonable. that's because my no-claim discount won't be affected. after that, i drove down to bishan to have dinner with one of my university friends. he's working in the sin ming area, so i suggested that we go for chicken rice. we spent about...4 hours together? dinner, then a long walk around the neighbourhood, stopping to sit down for a while, then a second long walk back to the car, ending with me dropping him off at his bus stop. i enjoyed it. one topic of our conversation was about getting into shape. apparently, he's also become too out of shape for his own liking, so we were commiserating with/for each other a little. he's got a lack of time due to being bogged down by work, while i have more weight to lose. so in a way, we're starting on equal footing? i doubt you can measure it like that. anyway, i just told him that his goal is not to let me catch up to him. i'll blog more about health and fitness plans later, or maybe in a separate post.

like i said earlier, today's been great so far. i woke up bright and early to top off the car's fuel tank, and pump the tyres up a little too. then i was very on time to pick up two elders for turf city. had an enjoyable time there, then sent one elder back. after which i parked at my aunt's place, and walked to marine parade central to get the present for my friend in australia, then to parkway to meet some of the chemistry guys for lunch. we ate at sakuraya, which as one of them said, was a refreshing change because we were not meeting (1) at night, (2) on a weekday, and (3) at the NUS alumni guild house. had some conversation, and got caught up with them. now that we're no longer in close-ish proximity, it's easy to lose touch with each other. i'm happy that we make the effort to meet up fairly regularly.

since i reached parkway the earliest (for once!), i went to check out the samsung shop to find out the price of a replacement s-pen. i was willing to pay up to $60...and guess how much one costs? $118, that's how much. i saw that they had an alternative that was probably made in partnership with staedtler, as it was modelled after one of their pencils. it comes without the multi-purpose button, and cost $88. ridiculous, right!? the shock of learning the price even made me forget to ask about the colour issues on my phone's display. that's now set for tomorrow at bedok mall, probably before tuition. thankfully, i was poor/desperate enough to consider alternate avenues to get an s-pen. if i was still receiving scholarship money, i'd probably have paid the full price. but i'm broke, so the need for frugality won out. lack of money is a great way to cultivate prioritization skills and resourcefulness, i realize. so i turned to carousell in hopes of scoring a deal. i'd checked previously, but with no luck. this time, i found 2 listings, one was from a shop ($56 or so), and the other was a private seller ($40). you can bet your life that i jumped on the second one. by some amazing stroke of luck, the seller lived in the siglap-ish area, which is only a short drive from my aunt's place. so after my senior sent me to a nearby bus stop (i had wanted to walk back, but rain was starting to fall), i took a short drive over and completed the transaction. wanted to ask the seller to knock the price down to $35, but couldn't find an opportunity to. well, at least the s-pen came with a free pen loop which sticks onto the cover of the tablet. maybe i can convince myself that that's where the extra $5 i paid went. all in all, it was a good deal, and i'm not complaining. at least that's what i'm telling myself.

came back at around 4:00+pm to rest, and saw that the sky was getting unusually dark for that time of the day. so i decided to quickly go down to rivervale mall to collect my dry-cleaning. that went without a hitch, and as you'll have read at the start of this post, i made it back just before it started to rain monkeys and elephants. some other plans have firmed up in the interim, so i think it's a good time to update the checklist:

things to do tomorrow
- check on the phone's display at bedok mall
- usual tuition
- clear chemicals
- print itinerary
- bring big box of stationery and assorted stuff back
- meet NUS photocopy auntie and uncle for dinner

things to do on monday
- swim at safra tampines
- grocery shopping at giant tampines
- clean my room (sweeping and mopping)
- am i missing anything? feels like i am

things to do on tuesday
- attempt two consecutive days of swimming
- settle travel insurance
- meet scary JC friend for dinner, maybe send her to the airport (still tentative)

things to do on wednesday
- consider three consecutive days of swimming
- TCM at 3:00pm
- finish packing luggage!

things to do on thursday (national day)
- meet my cousin for another claim
- makeup tuition

things to do on friday
- fly
- remember duty free sake and whiskey

things to do in the interim between trips
- print documents for asian games
- meet the lawyer if i can't do so this coming week

should be doable. just have to remember to pack all/at least most of the stuff i need. my cousin says most of the stuff i might forget can be bought over there. but why spend unnecessary money? so far, i think most of my expenses will be on food and transport when i'm with my friend (chemical engineer cousin has said that i'm covered for food as long as she's taking me places). don't really plan on doing much shopping; the only thing i have plans to get so far is a namecard holder which is selling up to 30+% cheaper over there as compared to the wallet shop. considering a portable hard disk for storage, but we'll have to check prices on that. guess i'll see what else is worth buying? supplements seem to be a popular choice. have to check with my aunt if she wants any.

somehow, i feel less tired from today's whirl of activity, as compared to a typical day spent rotting at home. perhaps rotting at home causes lethargy, not exactly tiredness/fatigue. have to shake that urge off, especially with plans to get more active. as you know, swimming and gym are planned to be undertaken in conjunction with each other. right now, i have the frequency at 5 days a week, one swim and one gym session a day. but let's see how my muscles and joints hold out. have to remind myself to train hard, yet give my body time to get used to the new demands, and not to overtrain. my BMT OC used to tell us "there's always another day to train". at the same time, i shouldn't use that as an excuse to deviate from the plan due to laziness, especially since it seems like i'll have no other responsibilities (except thesis-related stuff a little later on) for the foreseeable future. to be more specific about my exercise plans, i'll leave the gym routine to the genesis coaches. for swimming, the plan is to swim continuously for a certain time, say 30 to 45 minutes. it sounds doable on paper, but then so does running a marathon. i'll start with 30, and tune it from there. need a timer, though, and that's where the gear fit 2 comes in. it's been severely underutilized since i got it, and i hope to change that from now on. food-wise, i think the general guideline is minimal carbs, minimal processing. i realize that steaming may be a more...healthy/efficient(?) way of cooking, as compared to my stew operation. given my indecisiveness when it comes to food, i'm thinking of sticking to a small pool of highly nutritious ingredients. for protein, i can narrow it down to salmon and chicken. vegetables are a little trickier. i'm thinking broccoli and cabbage right now, but will seek some other opinions. although i haven't tried it yet, i think that i should be ok with repetitive food...provided that i cooked it myself, of course. the bias towards liking the taste of your own food should cancel out the monotony. besides, i still have herbs and spices on my side. i foresee vinegar being an important accompaniment to the salmon.

feeling a little...fidgety. i know the reason why, but it's not something i want to publicly disclose here. 5 full days left before i fly on the 10th. i'm mostly excited, yet a little apprehensive too. i'm just afraid that the excitement of meeting my friend is clouding my perception of his personality and character. given that he's 22, i suppose that i should expect a certain degree of immaturity and recklessness, maybe. thing is, he's different one-on-one and in a group. hope i'll get the one-on-one version more. it's also my first time staying with chemical engineer cousin! wait, that's not exactly true. there was a period of time where she was staying at my aunt's place, and i happened to be staying there over the holidays too. we get along ok in general, but 10 days is kind of a stretch. that's why i'm crashing at my friend's place a few days here and there, to give them a break from me too. i trust things will work out.

-random thought of the day: Still fidgety.-

Learnt something extremely mindblowing (or as russell peters' dad would say, mind-blasting) yesterday while reading some posts on english grammar and spelling. there was the usual your/you're, irregardless, deadline/dateline, there/their/they're stuff, which i feel nobody above the age of 14 should get wrong. there was also a section on C/S words, ie. words that have alternate forms that differ by a C or S. examples include defense/defence, license/licence, and practise/practice. i had always thought that the different spelling was just a UK/US difference thing, but apparently it's not. it actually seems that the S-spelling is the verb form of the word, while the C-spelling is the noun form! like, "a good practice is to practise something daily". or "he obtained his licence, which licenses him to drive heavy vehicles". amazing as that is, that's not the mindblowing bit yet. the mindblowing bit is that without realizing it, i already knew an example of such a word, but never applied it across to the 3 examples above! the word i've known about is "advise/advice", and i'm very clear on the distinction, too. HOW did i not make the association!? well, now i know.

today was reasonably fulfilling, though i didn't get much stuff done. weird, right? the air-con guy came down in the morning and serviced the air-cons. had to wait for him since i'm the one with the most flexible schedule in the house. after that, i drove down to westgate and looked there as well as in JEM for a present for my friend who's hosting me in australia for a few days. none of the shops i went to had the thing i wanted, so it was a little bit of a wasted trip? well, not really. i got to see how both malls have changed, and got to test my emotions there again. you see, the ex and i would have weekly weekday dates there, and it went on for quite a while. didn't feel any sadness, which is good. i suppose it's expected that my emotions are not compromised any more, considering that the 1-year breakup anniversary is in 5 weeks and a bit.

since i wanted to fully utilize my time outside, i decided to go to the stationery shop today, to browse and save on shipping costs. i could have just placed my orders online, since my total came up to more than $50 anyway. my original intention was just to get a blank hardcover notebook, for writing and stuff. wanted the black one (you know my colour preferences) but it was out of stock despite the website advertising it. so i settled for the only other colour, which was orange. not entirely bad, but not my first choice. i happened to chance upon a beautiful black leather-bound journal, with blank pages as well. it was so pretty that i almost bought it, save for two deterring factors - the price ($82 or so) and that it couldn't be laid flat on a surface. makes writing more difficult. ended up buying another larger softcover notebook because it looked nice. yes, i have a notebook problem. so sue me. i will find ways to use them, though. need to find uses for my rubbishy u-zone notebooks too. maybe one for learning japanese, one fitness journal...that still leaves 7 notebooks idle. i'll figure something out.

also at the stationery shop, i got talking with a lasalle art student. she's a painter by training, but was in there to buy a pen. i offered her some help with fountain pens, and showed her how to fill up the ones that she'd bought. it was weirdly spontaneous, but scary JC friend says that i should step out of my comfort zone more. i took about 3 times as long as i'd originally planned due to the interaction. not complaining, it's nice to meet someone taking such a different path. she was extremely fascinated when i told her that i'm a scientist. it's the "grass is always greener" thing, i guess. i admire artists and musicians so much, because they do amazing things with pigments and sound waves respectively. maybe she feels that way about me, but with atoms and molecules instead. she said that she wants to hear more about science, so maybe another meeting is on the cards? and before you say it, this is not even remotely a relationship prospect, for a number of reasons that i won't elaborate upon just yet. long story short, no way in hell. not because there's anything wrong with her or anything, so don't go assuming, please.

while talking to her, she made an obscure reference to dabbling in "chemistry" when younger, which i understood to mean "drugs". maybe it's because i was somewhat of a loner, and the few people that i hung out with were more or less law-abiding citizens, but i never had any connections to people with drugs or drug problems. none that i knew about, anyway. what's more worrying to me is that this girl isn't the first person from that age group in singapore to tell me about their drug use. the scumbag from june also told me about using heroin, though to be fair, i don't place much stock in the things they said any more. there's one more singaporean from a top school who i coincidentally know from final fantasy. she said something like "almost everyone was hopped up on speed, E, or some other substance" (paraphrased). like, really? i must have been hanging out with the wrong crowd back in my schooldays! or technically, that would make them the right crowd, i suppose. i wonder what's causing this, and if there were such issues in my schools when i was still enrolled there. the most hardcore thing i ever did myself was probably underage drinking, and even then it was limited more or less to bacardi silver. incidentally, i don't think they make that any more, do they? i remember it being light and citrus-flavoured, almost like sprite with 5% alcohol content. well...one more reason not to have kids. and i have to talk about the whole topic of having kids. conversation with my friend the other day brought up a few interesting points, which i want to think deeper upon.

final stop for today was the huge giant just off the TPE. i thought about it, and realized that doing the swimming thing at safra tampines would be more economical, especially because if i time it right, i'll pay a maximum parking charge of $2.85 for a disproportionately long stay there. plus, towels are provided, meaning less laundry for me. with those thoughts in mind, i went to the aforementioned giant to get swimwear and goggles. i realize that goggles with corrective lenses (for people with non-perfect eyesight) are becoming increasingly more difficult to find. or maybe they're being sold at specialty stores, like world of sport. anyway, i figured that if i could see well enough without glasses to conduct classes in judo, i can probably see well enough to avoid bumping into obstacles while swimming. got a fairly nice pair of goggles; some ninja thing. nice that the goggles came bundled with earplugs too, so there won't be the annoying feeling of having residual water in my ears. wonder if i'll need sunblock...that didn't cross my mind until now. well, we'll see. worst case i get some sunburn. nothing i haven't experienced before. contingency: swim when the sun isn't as strong, like in the evenings.

in case i haven't mentioned it yet, that giant lives up to its name - it's HUGE! i don't know much about area estimation, but if i had to guess, i'd say that it's about twice to 3 times the area of bishan bus interchange. according to a free online area calculator tool, the area of giant is about 17300 square metres. the bus interchange is approximately 10700 square metres, so it looks like i was kind of off. the actual factor is about 1.6 times, which i guess is close to 2? but definitely not 3. sorry for the digression. my reason for bringing up its hugeness is to emphasize and justify how many items are for sale, as well as the variety. let's put it this way - they sell bicycles. their produce section is correspondingly larger than say, NUTC in rivervale mall. apart from the larger variety, prices are cheaper too! best part, they have whole salmon for sale, and at a cheaper price than the pre-cut portions at NTUC. broccoli is hell of an expensive though. about $6 per kg. will have to look at alternative vegetables, with recommendations from the genesis coaches. but i think that my future shopping will be done at giant tampines, at least while my hours are still flexible like this. did i mention that parking is free? that's just the icing on the cake, though. and after all the travelling is done, i have to start thinking of ways to pull in more money. having one tuition kid is nice, but the costs are piling up. need to find a way to defray them more.

-random thought of the day: MORE CONFIDENCE!-

Forgot to include the various meet-ups with friends in my previous checklist. managed to get a couple of things done in the past few days, so let's do a revised version, somewhat ordered in terms of priority/chronology:

things to do tomorrow
- settle air-con servicing
- go to star vista to get a new blowtorch (maybe not?)
- go to JEM to get a gift for australia friend
- go grocery shopping and do meal prep for the remaining time in singapore

things to do on friday
- clean my room (sweeping and mopping)
- collect dry-cleaning (flexible, can be postponed to another day)
- meet my university friend(s?) for dinner

things to do on saturday
- refuel the car (if not done earlier)
- turf city driving
- go to parkway parade to check on the s-pen and phone display
- collect the AUD and a jacket/windbreaker from my aunt
- printing documents for asian games

things to do on sunday
- usual tuition
- clear chemicals

things to do next wednesday
- TCM
- pack luggage!

things to do on thursday
- meet my cousin for another claim (check his availability)
- makeup tuition

things with no fixed date yet
- take a look at the stationery shop, but maybe don't buy yet
- meet scary JC friend
- meet NUS photocopy auntie and uncle

seems like the list got even longer! maybe because i went into more detail. before i talk about the future, let's review the past. yesterday was rather happening. i went down to waterway point in the afternoon to check out s-pens, wireless chargers, and blowtorches. decided to walk there, for the dual purposes of fitting in some exercise and stress-testing my knee. the walk took about 30-40 minutes at a leisurely pace. that was probably the only good that came out of the trip. i didn't find anything useful at all! it seems that due to punggol being a new-ish estate which is popular among newlyweds and young families, the mall is correspondingly catered to that demographic. apart from the usual food joints, more than a few shops there sell things like baby products and household appliances. i went looking in the M1 shop and best denki for my tech needs, but nothing came up. apparently, the best chance i have of getting an s-pen is from the samsung shop. have to sidetrack a little to comment on the appalling service standards in best denki. i think they're shorthanded or something, because nobody came forward to help me when it was obvious that i was looking for something. oh well. will probably not go there any more. was looking for a wireless charger because my cables are mostly micro-USB due to my note 5. but since the note 8 has a USB-C port, that obviously won't work. samsung was nice enough to give a micro-USB to USB-C adapter, but that's somewhat failing now. so, i figured that going wireless would be better. a new wireless charging pad retails for $138 at the M1 shop. i've seen preowned ones go for as low as $15 on carousell. wonder why there's such a huge discrepancy in price. oh, i also found a kitchen equipment shop where they sell waiters' corkscrews for $2 each. good to know in case i ever lose my current one.

after the disappointing time at waterway point, i went to punggol mall to take a look around. it's smaller than rivervale mall in terms of land area i believe, but there are 4 storeys compared to 3 in the latter. i was actually fairly surprised at the selection/variety of shops there, though i doubt that i will be visiting there for anything. unless i apply for and get a job at the tuition centre there, but i'll wait for the outcome from the learning lab first. to my relief, my knee held up after all that walking. i set a new step record even before reaching punggol mall, i think. what's not so relieving is that now it seems to be my ankle that's giving problems. i've sprained it before way back in secondary school, and i think once you've had that kind of injury, that joint is never truly back to 100% any more. worse still, it's more susceptible to injury in the future. hopefully the TCM will sort it out.

last thing yesterday was meeting one of my old secondary school friends for dinner. in a very 不知不觉 manner, we hadn't met for almost a year prior to last night. we updated each other on our lives; him - engaged and about to be married, new job; me - broke up, submitted thesis. that was more or less the highlights reel, but we did talk and catch up on other stuff too. conversation with him is insightful, probably because he studied psychology and sees things differently from non-psychology-educated people. i'm grateful that he's open-minded and willing to talk about sensitive issues with me. since he's psychology-trained, i did ask him about my self-confidence issues with physical appearance and all that. he told me that looks do matter, but probably not as much as i think. confidence, personal grooming, dressing style, speech, can all make up for imperfections in face and body. he also advised me to do both things concurrently. project a good image by using the aforementioned factors to my advantage, while improving my appearance so that it becomes an even more powerful boost by the time i'm in shape. i see the sense in that, but let's see how things go. the most important lesson of which i have to keep reminding myself is that i hold 50% power in all interactions as well. i have as much right to reject a person as a person has to reject me.

we ate at safra toa payoh. since i was there, i went to ask about memberships and stuff like that. thought about doing something lower-impact for my joints, and swimming came to mind. swimming pool entry is free in all clubhouses for members, but the problem is that safra punggol doesn't have a swimming pool! it's scheduled to be built by 2021, which is a significantly long time away. the two next-closest safras to me are safra tampines and safra yishun, both of which are about a 15-minute drive from sengkang. based on absolute distance, safra tampines is nearer by a bit. should go explore there one day. though it kind of defeats the idea of saving cost through free swimming pool entry. maybe i should consider walking to sengkang swimming complex or something. the $1.50 entry fee will still be cheaper than parking at safra. will sit on this for a while more. i was also informed that the energyone gym was running a promotion, $400 for 14 months, subject to approval. at about $28 per month, or $1 a day, that's quite a steal. will enquire more about it. reminder: do so by this month.

the days ahead appear to be rather full of activity! most of the items should be quite self-explanatory, so i'll just pick a few to expand on. probably the most eye-catching word in the entire list would be "blowtorch". i don't profess to be into molecular gastronomy or anything like that, but i am using this device called an anova precision cooker. "anova" is the brand, "precision cooker" is the fancy way of saying "water heater and circulator". it basically allows for sous vide cooking without a lot of the fancy devices and contraptions. like, i don't even use a vacuum sealer. just ziploc bags and water displacement combined with lung power to suck the air out. it seems that the first idea for sous vide machines came from hotplate/stirrers. just some small trivia for you. so how do blowtorches figure into all of this? searing. some meats (like fish) can be eaten right out of the bag, while other meats (say, pork or chicken) benefit from a quick sear to improve the outside texture and to add flavour through the maillard reaction. the cleanest/most fun way to do that is - you guessed it -  with a blowtorch. that's why. but given my upcoming modifications to my diet plan, i may not need a blowtorch any more.

which leads to the next point - how is my diet going to be modified? my current MO is to make a giant pot of vegetable stew, and supplement that with meat. after talking to the TCM people, i got the recommendation of lowering my intake of sugar, salt, and oil. the massage therapist told me she ate boiled cabbage for a month, after which her cholesterol, blood sugar, and blood pressure problems disappeared. maybe there is some truth to the stereotype of steamed chicken and broccoli being the go-to diet for people on a training regimen. thinking of giving that a go. broccoli is expensive, though. will work things out after returning from all the travels.

i guess that's it for now? should be. i'm hoping for everything in life to go smoothly. the thesis exam, all my travels, refereeing at the asian games, interactions with this new person...as far as i can tell, they're sincere. but that's what i said about the lying scumbag from june during the initial stages as well. so far, signs look good, with no inconsistencies. more importantly, this person is much more responsive on chat, and chats more...normally, i suppose. i'm just hoping that our interaction continues to at least be good, if not on a general upward trend.

-random thought of the day: BE CONFIDENT!-