I've got an archived post discussing current events, which will probably no longer be current by the time i publish that post. but instead of working on that, i'll just add some thoughts about school C after this week's classes.

i think i've mostly figured out why it's my least favourite school. the biggest reason is because they're inconsistent, in that their actions don't match their words. like, they'll hang up an "english day" banner when i'm due to visit. but japanese will still be the primary language spoken during english class. earlier, i kind of just accepted that there is a need to give instructions in japanese. but thinking about my experience in learning other languages (chinese and japanese), i realize that english was very rarely used, even for classroom management. using english in chinese class was basically unheard of. some of my chinese teachers probably didn't even have english language certifications! and i know what some of you will say - "but chinese is used at home in singapore, right?" yes, to an extent. but in my particular case, i don't recall learning chinese at home! even for japanese, they gave like a list of phrases that a teacher might use in class, and told us to refer to it. to be fair, they included a romaji pronunciation guide, which i wouldn't do if the situation was reversed (ie. giving an english sheet with katakana pronunciation guide). also, that was done for university students, who probably learn more efficiently.

a secondary reason is my interactions with the teachers. in terms of english teachers, this school is the best-staffed out of all the schools in town. they have one teacher for each level, excluding me! one of the teachers is very...domineering? bossy? no, those are too negative. what i want to say is that this teacher has a very firm idea of how they want the class to run, and they get annoyed with deviations from that ideal plan. that's conflicting with my style, because i'm more loose with time management and the overall lesson plan. like, i won't repeat a conversation from the textbook word-for-word, especially if it sounds odd to me. but yes, i'm the assistant in this case, so i'm trying to suit this teacher's style. the other 2 teachers are friendly to me, but i get the impression that they don't want me interfering too much with their teaching. evidence: for their classes, i'm usually told to go to a separate room and evaluate skit performances/talk to groups of students. i don't know their thought process, but i personally think that i'd be better utilized helping the students to prepare for the skits! of course, i could give the kids lousy scores for below-acceptable pronunciation and performance, but that's lose-lose. granted that one of the classes is graduating soon, so there's not much that i can do for them either. and one of those teachers has a habit of saying "i want you to..." when asking me to do something. i'm pretty sure it isn't meant as an order, because the teacher will always ask if i have time to do it. probably just a cultural/english difference, but i was surprised, to say the least, when i first heard it. 

having said all of that though, school C is the most important school in the town, because (1) it's the biggest, and (2) the kids from 2 primary schools will be going there from april onwards. so...i don't know. i guess i should figure something out. alternatively i can wait till april to see if any of the teachers are transferring out and if teachers with whom i can get along better are transferring in. of course, there's a huge random factor involved, and there's a chance that worse teachers could transfer in as well. so that's probably not the best bet. well...will probably worry about it when things happen. on that note, i'm also a little concerned that the cute teacher from school A may be transferred out as well. maybe i should ask him out for lunch or something, get to know him better outside of school.

the past week was a little shorter, due to a public holiday on tuesday. still feeling tired, though. worse, i had a mild stomach upset last night. not sure why...maybe from eating something slightly off? good thing is that i'm basically over it now, just have some slight discomfort every now and then. should be fully recovered by tomorrow.

-random thought of the day: Rainy day tomorrow.-

Cultural exchange is a main aim of JET, arguably more so than the english teaching. so with that in mind, i thought i'd share something that i'm sure most foreigners don't know - how to offer condolences in japanese. most people learn japanese for happier reasons, like wanting to visit japan for sightseeing. so, death is something that's not usually discussed in regular japanese language lessons. unfortunately, i've already had to offer condolences to two different people in the office this year, and the phrase that i used was "お悔やみ申し上げます" - pronounced "okuyami moushiagemasu". that translates to "i sincerely offer [you] my condolences". there are other expressions, but i thought that this one was the easiest to remember. it's also not too long, so less risk of mistakes or tripping over your words while saying it. and while i hope you never have to use it, having the knowledge is always good.

yesterday was more tiring than usual. the primary 5 and 6 kids had collaboration classes with kids from another school, and there was a meeting about english language teaching that i had to attend after those classes. end result was that i slept for about 12 hours last night to this morning. as for the meeting, i think i only understood like 30% of what was discussed. the other non-japanese english teacher and i gave recommendations on how english teaching in the town can be improved, but i'm not sure if our ideas will be implemented or even considered. i'm actually surprised at how low the standard of english is, considering the materials that one of my predecessors made about 10 years ago imply that primary school kids were able to hold a simple conversation. something went wrong with english teaching between then and now, because barely a handful of kids (even in secondary school) are at that level. hopefully i can change that for the better in the time that i'm here.

now that i've been in the schools for a while, i think i've got a decent grasp of how i feel about each school. since i have 3 secondary schools, i'll call them school A, B, and C. school A is one of my favourite schools. the teachers there try and talk to me regularly, and the kids are very nice too. i just wish that the sec 2s there would be a bit more vocal during english class, though i think they're starting to warm up to me a little now. biggest plus for me is that the cute teacher works there! school B is the smallest school, with only 7 kids (well, 8, but one of them doesn't go very often). on average, i like the kids there the most. the staff are nice and treat me well too, but some of them are a little...eccentric. not that that's a bad thing, just that i'm sometimes not sure how to react to certain things they say. i trust that they don't mean any harm, though. the sad thing is, due to the low enrollment, school B is due to close at the end of this academic year. it's sad, because i like the english teacher there quite a lot, plus i think she's one of the better teachers.

that leaves school C. it's by no means bad, but it's my least favourite school. for one, the teachers there are...distant. while i would miss the english teachers from schools A and B if they were transferred out, i would be indifferent to losing the english teachers in school C. well, except maybe for one of them. it might be because that school C is the largest secondary school (about 80 students, compared to 19 and 7), so everyone is more busy and the atmosphere is not as homey as the other 2 schools. the kids there are nice enough, but quiet and not as friendly. could be because they're under more stress, i don't know. but i suppose i should count my blessings; none of the kids are like, BAD bad. probably just moody from hormones and puberty, plus the language barrier makes it difficult to communicate. i was reading a thread on reddit about nightmare JET experiences, and the kids in some other places are downright abusive! telling JETs things like "go back to where you came from" or "learn to speak japanese", or even getting physical with teachers, both their regular teachers and JETs alike! i am tremendously grateful that i don't have to deal with that kind of misbehaviour. so far, i think the worst i've had to deal with are kids talking and sleeping in class, which is a walk in the park by comparison.

since i only have one primary school right now, it's my favourite primary school by default. i enjoy my classes there a lot, though it's really tiring! at this time, the kids have more or less gotten used to me, and some of them have even warmed up to me a bit. that's good, because these kids will end up going to school C for secondary education. i figure that having kids who are already familiar with me (and who hopefully like me) will make class easier. i should probably mention that each secondary school has its own affiliated primary school, so kids in primary school A will go to secondary school A. but since secondary school B is closing, the kids there will go to secondary school C. wonder how that will work out. i also like the staff in the primary school a lot, because they've been very friendly and welcoming. might be a common trait with primary school staff, i don't know.

one odd (to me) thing about the japanese school year is that it starts in april and ends in march the following year. probably to coincide with the start of spring or something, i'm not sure. takes a bit of getting used to, because kids born in different calendar years can be in the same grade. one of the first surprises i had was learning that a kid born in june was older than a kid in the same grade who was born in february. they later clarified that it was february of the following year! coming from a place where the official academic year follows the calendar year (except for universities), it was a bit disorienting. since the school year ends in march, that's also when graduation ceremonies are being held. and all 3 of my secondary schools' graduation ceremonies are on the same day. don't know if the schools discussed it among themselves first, but school A invited me to theirs, school C told me not to go to theirs (because COVID), and school B didn't say anything. to avoid scheduling conflicts, i asked to attend school B's school-closing ceremony instead of their graduation ceremony. that way, i can still show my face at one of their significant events, while not letting school A down either, since they were the first to extend an official invitation. waiting to hear back from the head teacher, because he said he'd have to discuss it with the principal...but here's hoping that things go according to plan.

good thing for me is that the primary school is having their graduation ceremony on a different day from the secondary schools, so there's a chance that i'll be able to attend...provided the total headcount is still within restrictions. it's probably going to be a bit harder, since there are quite a lot of graduating kids, plus parents and all that. but it's not that big a loss, since i'll see the kids again in secondary school anyway.

another reason why school A is my favourite school is because they scheduled a field trip on monday (which is when i'm scheduled to visit their school), and they invited me along! initially, i was thinking of declining, because i'd planned to take off-in-lieu on monday, which would give me a 4-day weekend (tuesday's a public holiday). but after more thinking, i reasoned that it would be a new experience, and it would allow me to spend more time with the kids, as well as with the cute teacher! so yes, i'm going. the field trip is to a zoo in a neighbouring town. i've never been to a zoo in japan, so that'll be interesting.

for my first valentine's day in japan, i brought chocolate for all my secondary school kids. unfortunately, the head teacher at school C very nicely told me not to give them to the kids, because COVID. never mind that each piece is individually wrapped, COVID. oh well. it's hard for me to argue with that without coming off as confrontational and inconsiderate, especially with the state of the world today, so i just sucked it up. not exactly my loss anyway. consequence is that i have 7 extra boxes of chocolate for personal consumption. not good for my diet, but it'll be fine in the long run.

my junior from lab posted a status update on facebook which included the word "examiner". knowing that she was done with school, i guessed that she might have been referring to a patent examiner. and after some poking around on linkedin, i found that i was right! in fact, she's now working for the same company that i applied to just before getting JET confirmation. yes, the one that rejected me. i don't bear her any ill will at all for landing that job. in fact, i'm happy for her! i also took the chance to do my once-every-few-months poke-around on linkedin, and saw to my surprise that a few people had left the accursed IP firm, including 2 of the 3 people who entered around the same time as me, as well as some more senior people who seemed to be well on their way to patent attorney qualification. it did make me think, though, about how much the qualification actually means to me. it seems that a lot of people doing IP-related jobs aren't qualified. but based on what i know, it's better to have it because more salary, more career advancement opportunities, plus more freedom to practise. that comes with a cost too, that any mistakes in the application are on your head if you're the attorney that signs off on it. but you know the spiderman quote, great something or another. i guess i'll sit on it a bit more. at this point in time, i don't think that i'm ready to attempt an IP job in japan. just the language skills requirement alone would probably kill me! well...let's see how things will have changed by the time i'm ready to call it quits with JET.

-random thought of the day: Feeling like an auntie - so happy to see eggs on sale today!-

Random occurrence can be stranger than premediation. i say this because the first letter of my previous 7 posts spell "PANTLES". there wouldn't be a last S because i don't repeat starting letters for consecutive posts. and yes, i'm serious. this wasn't planned at all. on top of that, my 1881st post was published on 11/02/2021. i missed publishing a palindromic post on a palindromic date by just one day! well, i suppose i still have 02 december, if i follow the way the americans and japanese write the date. but my next palindromic post number will be 1991, and i don't think i can write 109 posts (excluding this one) in 10 months. i'll need about 11 posts per month, or roughly one post every 2 to 3 days. well...i probably COULD, but the majority of them wouldn't be very meaningful.

had a bit of drama in final fantasy. well, not drama drama, but it was annoying anyway. so, i messaged someone who was recruiting for their raid team. i read the ad wrongly, and later realized that they were looking for a role that i couldn't play. but the leader assured me everything was ok and even got me to join their discord server. ten minutes later, he said that the role was no longer available due to a miscommunication. i am disproportionately upset because he had TWO chances to tell me that there was a mismatch. i hate having my expectations raised and dropped like that. but well...this is not unusual in games. another contributing factor to my upsetedness is that due to bad timing, the raid tier was released when i was about to finish quarantine, and you all know that i didn't have fibre internet for my first month here. so i'm very behind in raids, to the point where i'm still at the first of 4 fights, whereas a not-small number of guildmates have cleared all 4 fights already. it's more annoying because if i clear this tier, it'll be the first time that i finish an entire expansion's raids.

well, the plan is to move on and either find a team, or rely on matchmaking. there are pros and cons to each approach, and i've cleared fights with randoms as well as with a fixed party before. not sure why this particular incident got me so bent out of shape, but it'll pass. that person is on my blacklist now anyway, so that's a small measure of petty revenge. yes, it's not much at all, but i'll take what i can get.

the oddest thing happened yesterday morning. on the way to the carpark beside the town hall, i had to cross an inclined bridge made of metal. the stupid design of the carpark and town hall is something for another post, but suffice for now to say that i don't have a very high opinion of the design. since it rained on sunday night and in early monday morning, the bridge was wet, and i slipped. my right foot went out under me and i fell. i don't remember how i landed, but it wasn't an all-out fall; i still had some dignity intact. but the odd thing is, the quadricep muscle on my right leg (and only the right leg) has been aching since then. i suspect the fall may have caused me to hyperextend it, or worst case, it's a minor tear. whatever it is, it's made going up and down stairs quite unpleasant. as luck would have it, there are very many stairs both at the new town hall and in all my schools. hopefully it gets better within the week, or more ideally, overnight while i sleep.

it's weird - i find myself thinking the same thoughts every day at certain places, but by the time i reach home, i'll forget what exactly those thoughts were! location-dependent memory, i guess. well, my usual philosophy is "if i can't recall it, it probably isn't that important". maybe i should make more effort, like record it down on my phone the next time i'm in those particular locations.

oh! i forgot to update about staying over at my supervisor's place! it's the second time i've done so, and somehow or another, earthquakes happened on both nights so far. i made chicken curry for them using the pre-made spice pack that i brought from singapore. good news is they liked it! better news is that nobody suffered from food poisoning! as an indirect consequence of this (because my supervisor told some colleagues that she thought the curry tasted good), the board of education wants to do one school lunch per school term that features singaporean food...and i've been asked to find recipes! quite exciting, and i'm actually very surprised/touched that they even thought of this idea. now, all i need are recipes that are easy enough to make, and which have ingredients that are easy enough to source for. i also told her about the cute teacher. unfortunately, she doesn't interact much with the school staff (aside from the english teachers because they work with the JETs), so she wasn't able to tell me anything about him. but she did say that she'll keep a lookout and let me know if any information surfaces, so that's nice. feels like i've got an ally in this endeavour, or something like that.

so many more things to blog about, like graduation ceremonies, primary school kids, valentine's day, a potential zoo trip, and the cute teacher, to name a few topics off the top of my head. but it's getting late, and there's still school tomorrow morning. also, i don't have complete information about graduation yet, so best for me not to blog about that at this time. and it's almost time for me to sleep anyway. just going to do a bit more mindless crafting before calling it a night.

-random thought of the day: Need better-quality sleep.-

Purely by coincidence, today (CNY eve) is also a public holiday in japan. it's their national day i think? the actual name is 建国記念の日, so i don't think "national day" is too far off. mildly annoying to have a holiday that's so near yet so far from a weekend. but well, i'll manage. not like i can do anything about it, anyway.

i've said before that i don't need much in the way of material needs. just a house, a car, and enough money to treat myself every now and then. in that regard, life in japan now is more than adequate. i could probably spend double to triple of my current daily expenditure on food, and still have enough money to pay the bills and have a bit of savings. but that's not going to happen, because i still have to prepare for life after JET.

on a less tangible note, would i be happy teaching english in rural japan long-term? there are 2 aspects to examine - teaching english, and rural japan. my current thought is no for the former, yes for the latter. i've known for a long time that while i like teaching and am (i think, at least) decent at it, it doesn't give me fulfillment. perhaps that's because my teaching experience has been in singapore and japan, where schools mainly focus on preparing kids for exams. to be fair, all schools do that to some degree. just that it's especially obvious in these 2 countries. also, especially for teaching english in japan, i honestly feel like the japanese education system isn't the best for learning english. i'm starting to see why japanese people on a whole are not very good at english, and why the same problems regarding english have persisted in japan despite 30+ years of JET and over 100 years of english learning history in the country. in particular, regarding pronunciation. l and r, b and v are the 2 more common problem areas. and part of the reason is that some teachers encourage their students to use furigana (phonetic spellings of words in japanese letters) as pronunciation guides for english words. if you pronounce words using the japanese alphabet, they're going to sound japanese! the other part is that basically everyone in japan pronounces english the japanese way, and to pronounce it the proper way would be going against the majority. i actually can kind of empathize, because the same problem occurs in singapore. example is the word "flour". so, i can kind of see why japanese kids may not want/be able to pronounce words properly. other factors include fear of making mistakes, not wanting to stand out from their peers, not having enough opportunities to use english outside of school, and even more.

life in rural japan is different from city life. obvious, right? unfortunately, i think it's bad timing that i'm on JET during a pandemic. it's certainly an atypical experience; most JETs are usually able to travel around and meet up with people. technically i'm still able to, but the experience will be severely diminished just thanks to the whole COVID atmosphere. that aside, life is good here; i can't really complain about anything. if i was doing something more intellectually stimulating, earning a bit more money, i would happily live here for good. well...i'd probably also want to move into a different house, purely out of concern for the nankai, but yes. if i could afford to be picky, maybe i'd choose a more developed town/city, but not quite on the level of tokyo. ideally, i'd want to live in every prefecture of japan...but considering japan has 47 prefectures, and considering that i'd probably want to live in each prefecture for at least a full year just for the complete experience, i don't think i can accomplish that within this lifetime.

while today is a holiday in japan, tomorrow is not. that means i'll be working on CNY day 1. not that big a deal, really. i don't miss CNY exactly, but i sure would like to see some people in singapore again. (in no particular order) the chemistry guys, scary JC friend, my cousin and his family, and some guildmates come to mind. lawyer guy has been completely off the radar, unfortunately. he didn't even come back for the current raid tier, so i guess it's not meant to be. hope i'll have better luck with at least one of my current interests now.

-random thought of the day: Feeling tired.-

Addendum to yesterday's post...just a few more things that happened, but slipped my mind when i was writing it. first, my supervisor unintentionally acted as my wingman (wingwoman?) with cute colleague. we were talking about social media, or social network services (SNS) as they're known in japan. i offhandedly said that i didn't really use line, and that my contacts list was kind of empty. she followed up by telling cute colleague, "you should add each other!". totally unplanned and unexpected. so, he's on my contact list now. as a result, i know his birthday (public on his profile), and how he looks maskless. i think he got thinner since his profile photo was taken. but anyway, that was an unexpected surprise. unfortunately for me, i think he's straight, so he may not be a romantic prospect. still, i feel like i owe it to myself to remove all doubt before writing him off.

the next surprise was a bit less pleasant. so by chance, i stumbled upon a profile of the ex. in it, he made a reference to being on the lookout for recreational drugs. not judging, but it's not something i approve of. it's a bit of an unfair statement, considering i don't have first-hand experience with drugs, and thus can't really present a balanced argument. but i know enough about how destructive addiction can be. although that's questionable too, since i don't know the addictive potential of whatever he's looking for. still, i'm grateful for the distance between us now, because i don't want to be tangled up in that sort of mess. in the spirit of trying everything once, i have thought about doing things like smoking and taking drugs before. at the same time, i think that the potential costs outweigh whatever benefits that there might be in my particular case. so, if i do it at all, it'll be when i have much less to lose - say, like when i'm on the verge of death or terminally ill. for the record, i don't feel anything for the ex. i'm concerned about him like i would be for any other human being, but i'm not about to interfere in his life, or rush to his rescue, or render any help even if he asks.

finally, the last surprise has to do with age. there's this guy i know from work. he's not with the board of education, but in one of the other departments in the town hall. he speaks good english because he used to date an american girl, but he ended up marrying a japanese girl. i even met his wife and kid (bumped into the whole family shopping at the supermarket). all this while, i'd always thought he was younger than me, because he looks young and has a one year old kid. so, kind of like at the stage of just starting his family. while we were talking yesterday, he casually mentioned that he had been to singapore when he was in primary 6, 25 years ago. do the maths, and you'll figure out that he's 37 years old! i swear, he looks 10 years younger than his actual age. i think it might be the fresh air, good food, and low-stress lifestyle here. actually, although mine are low, i don't know how other people's stress levels are. that's because as a JET, i sort of exist outside of the normal japanese hierarchy. it's good, because i can get away with doing things that would be unforgivable for a regular employee to do...like getting greetings wrong, or using wrong keigo. that probably won't be the case if i work for a regular company, so i guess i'd better learn while on JET.

-random thought of the day: Nice relaxing day today.-

Nothing particularly bad happened today, but i felt my mood take a dive at the end of the day. it was even more weird, considering that i had had a very good afternoon of classes, and i got to see the cute teacher, too! if i had to guess at the cause for the downturn in mood, i'd say that it was due to something that happened in the morning, where i unintentionally talked over the other english teacher. i think she got annoyed at it, based on her reaction of walking away from the front of the classroom. i hope that my peace offering of my packet drink from school lunch (it's too sweet for me anyway), plus some time apart over the weekend will help sweep this little episode under the rug.

you might find it weird, why i said "some time apart". as you may know, my arrival in japan was delayed by 2 months, and my deployment to schools was delayed by 4-ish months. so, the board of education (or maybe the individual schools) hired a non-JET ALT as a stopgap measure. now that i'm in japan, my teaching schedule overlaps with hers, to the point where we have classes together for 4 days a week! it's a bit too much, in my opinion, and would have been disastrous if we didn't get along. thankfully, she's pretty nice, and a great teacher. i trust that with her years of experience and living in japan, she won't let something like that get to her. i guess i'll have a better gauge of her mood on monday.

a few more interesting things happened this week. yesterday, a school's principal asked if i'd lost weight. while the answer is yes, i didn't think other people would notice! honestly, i haven't been very regular with weighing myself, but i have other indicators - like being able to tighten my belt more, and being able to take my pants off without unbuckling them (quite an achievement, considering these pants were tailored). but yes, i think the diet is working, because i don't have exercise plans until the weather gets warmer. the only exercise i get is climbing stairs and walking around in schools. maybe they were right, 80% of weight loss is what you do outside the gym.

today, i ate lunch with the primary 4 kids. i think out of all the levels in primary school, they've taken to me the most. evidence: they're the only class to invite me to play with them at the playground during recess. it was a nice thought, and i went down with them. but i didn't run around with as much wild abandon as they did because i still had afternoon classes! it's a good sign, that the kids are accepting me into their circles. some of them even told their teachers that they saw me at the supermarket! i guess that's how gossip spreads.

the kids here are so...simple. and i don't mean that in a derogatory manner at all. like, if i put a kid from kochi alongside a kid of equivalent age from singapore, the difference would be so obvious. in singapore, kids as young as primary school have smartphones, and use them in school. i'm not saying that the kids here don't have phones (the primary school kids probably don't), but i have yet to see a kid of any level take out their phone while on school premises. we were doing a speaking activity with the primary school kids, and they had to respond to "what do you want for your birthday?". a surprising number of them said "nothing". i won't discount the possibility that some of them are shy and/or don't know how to say their desired item in english, but i think i would never get that answer from singapore kids.

bedtime! tomorrow will be a final fantasy day (i haven't logged in for the past 2 days), and i'll try to fit in a walk as well. sunday will be cooking experimentation day. going to my supervisor's house next weekend, and i want to make sure that the stuff i bring passes muster.

-random thought of the day: Confirm that chocolate stocks are enough for all the students.-

Today has left me with a full heart. not because of english class, unfortunately (that actually gave me a bit of stress), but because of a special event organized by the school which i visited. for their last period, all the students attended a special talk on LGBT awareness. it was given by a (female) school counsellor and her (female) partner. or i think i can say "wife" because they got married last year. i was quite amused, because they're the stereotypical lesbian couple! one is more "butch" (tomboy - short hair, wears shirt and pants, more outgoing), and the other is more "femme" (feminine - long hair, wears dresses and skirts, soft-spoken). i know that stereotyping isn't good, but like i always say, stereotypes exist for a reason. and to find a couple that matched up with the stereotype so well was really funny.

most of the info in the talk wasn't new to me; i knew things like the distinction between biological sex and gender, as well as the various sexual orientations. interestingly, the speaker said there are broadly 4 types of sexuality - biological sex (what reproductive parts you have), gender (the gender you feel in your heart), gender assigned to you by society, and sexual orientation. out of all of those, i didn't/don't really think about society-assigned gender all that much, because i'm lucky enough to be a cis male, and i (for the most part) match society's perception of how a male should look and behave. short hair (except for that little phase in undergrad), male-appropriate clothing, deep-ish voice, etc. hiding my orientation is easy enough, because there are no visible tells (i think?), but for a trans person, having to hide their very identity, or embrace their identity and potentially get ridiculed (especially if they don't pass off well), is not fun.

what warmed my heart more was that there was a general air of acceptance and understanding in the school hall. more than that, i THINK the principal mentioned that there are kids in the school who are going through some doubt regarding their gender and/or orientation, and he encouraged everyone to be understanding and to respect others' privacy. at least, that's what my broken japanese picked up, but don't quote me on that. it heartens me, to see that the kids were generally receptive to the contents of the talk. one of them even said that as long as their partner was nice to them and they got along, the partner's gender didn't matter. actually, scratch that. it heartens me just to know that such a talk was even allowed in the first place! there would be so much outrage if this talk was proposed in singapore. at the same time i'm not foolish enough to believe that there can be zero opposition to any issue, even here in japan. maybe some kids don't approve, or think that being LGBT is wrong. if that's the case, i hope that they remember the last message of the talk - that nobody has the right to decide how others should live their lives. more than that, i hope there is a way for them to engage with an LGBT person for a different perspective.

after the talk, i had a short chat with the presenters. i congratulated them on their marriage, then followed up with "私たちのことを学生たちに教えてあげて、ありがとうございます", or "thank you for teaching the students about us". the hint was successfully conveyed, and i think we shared a moment. they were sympathetic upon learning about section 377a, and i wish my japanese was better, so i could have shared more about the LGBT rights situation in singapore. the speaker's partner is from one of the neighbouring prefectures, and she said that while people in kochi are not very informed about LGBT rights, people in the prefecture where she's from are more open to LGBT stuff. we shared a laugh when i told her that the teacher who i find cute (who teaches in another school) is also from that same prefecture!

the talk gave me some things to think about. first of all, the speaker is a school counsellor, though not in this town. that means she's employed by a town government, despite being so open about her orientation! that would be unthinkable in singapore. don't get me wrong, LGBT education professionals (teachers, counsellors, social workers) are employed in decently large numbers by MOE, but the unspoken stance is "don't ask, don't tell". i'm not one to scream something so personal from the rooftops, but i think that people who want to be open about their orientation shouldn't be forced to hide it. in fact, having good LGBT role models in the form of their teachers or other authority figures might help LGBT kids as they're growing up. goodness knows i could have used a role model in my teenage years. might have saved myself some agony.

when i shared today's happenings with my big brother figure, he rhetorically asked why my small fishing town is more progressive than metropolitan singapore. i wish i knew! the answer is probably something like "because the small fishing town is located in a more progressive country". it pains me that singapore is so wishy-washy about the whole 377a thing. like, refusing to repeal it, but promising not to actively enforce it? (not) sorry to say it, but politician's promises are worth their weight in gold; and since spoken promises don't weigh anything, they're absolutely worthless. i've seen posts on facebook suggesting that certain religious groups are the main source of opposition, and it makes me wonder why. what do they stand to gain from it? it's just discrimination, isn't it? "i don't like someone because they're not like me/because they do things which i find weird". all that "love the sinner, hate the sin" jazz doesn't fly by me either. who decided that being non-straight and non-cisgender is a sin, anyway? unless a higher being personally tells me so, i'm not going to believe a message that has probably been distorted over the millennia. think the broken telephone game, but with way more participants, and over a much longer period. evidence that the true teachings of religions (all of them, not just a single one in particular) has been differently interpreted is found in the existence of multiple denominations within each religion. but i don't really want to delve too deep into that can of worms right now. not worth getting all riled up and spoiling the good memories from earlier. to be fair, i must balance my point by saying that some LGBT folks aren't doing the community any favours either. and with the toxicity/infighting within the community itself, it'll take a while before progress can be made.

-random thought of the day: How can I be of support to LGBT kids here?-