First days of a new semester in NUS have generally been pretty bleh, and today wasn't an exception. compared to secondary school, the excitement just isn't there. i suppose university kids are too mature (read as "old") to show excitement or any other loud displays of emotion in public. whatever the case, it really was quite dull, and that was made even worse by some of the things that happened today.

for starters, organic lecture got cancelled. we were informed about it at 12:47pm. that sounds ok, until you realize that the lecture slot is from 12:00pm to 2:00pm. see the problem yet? we were sitting there like idiots for 47 minutes, until someone decided to call the professor and ask where the hell he was. it wouldn't have been so bad if the notice came earlier...at least i could have spent the time more constructively. nevertheless, not much harm done, so i can let this go relatively easily. good thing the professor also mentioned that thursday's lecture was cancelled as well. that way, i can laze around in bed a little longer in the morning.

meeting my inorganic lecturer was...ok. she seems like a nice person, if just a little too strict and by-the-book. one thing that kind of puts me off is that she appears to run her life strictly by the clock and, as a result, she's a stickler for deadlines. that's exactly what i'm not, so i don't foresee us being the best of friends. good thing we only have to maintain a good working relationship. i'm sure at least that is achievable. i am happy about the module outline...it demands consistency, which is good for me.

i have quite mixed feelings about the analytical lecturer at this point in time. his lecture style is pretty much "read off the slides", and it doesn't help that his module's content is drier than a desert to begin with. definitely doesn't make for conducive learning. but well...it's only been one lecture. perhaps it's a little soon to pass a verdict. i just hope that things start looking up a bit more, and soon.

during my inorganic lecture break, SJI boy SMSed me to tell me his chem grade. to my disbelief, he got a B3. i can't really explain it. any possible number of things could have gone wrong, or maybe the other people were just better. i don't know. but as i told him when he called me later in the day, the exact result isn't important now. after all, it's served its purpose, which was to get him into CJC. but even then, a part of me can't help but feel...angry? sad? disappointed? frustrated? well...a little of each, i suppose. let's put them together and say "negative" in general. come on, i'd be lying if i said that i was happy with his grade. after all, i've tutored him since he was sec 3, so i know (1) what i've taught him, and (2) what he's capable of. since i don't know the exact mark, i'm going to make the best of a not-good situation and believe that his B3 was bordering on an A2. it's more than likely, so that's what i shall think. i really hope that he's not stringing me along and getting me to believe that his grades are lousier than what he actually got. from the tone of his voice, i believe he's not lying. besides, i think he should know better.

hearing about the result also got me thinking. as you probably know by now, me thinking when in a negative mood results in negative thoughts. one particular thought went like this, 'am i destined to never have an A1 student?' out of the 4 sec 4 kids that i've tutored, i've got 3 B3s and an A2. those aren't very impressive statistics, if you ask me. what's missing? how can i push my kids to A1 standard? have i been underestimating the O-level paper? i'm not that inclined to pin blame on the kids, because some proverb says that the teacher is responsible for the student's shortcomings. i guess i just didn't push the kids hard enough, and/or when it mattered. it's to the point where i've considered giving tuition up. and if it wasn't my only source of income, i just might have. but oh well. i'm hoping that i'll have better luck with the A-level kids this year.

speaking of tuition, i have 2 confirmed kids and 1 undecided one. the 2 confirmed are RJC girl, who SMSed me yesterday, asking to resume next week, as well as another RGS girl, who just started sec 1. i'm taking it relaxed with this second kid, since it's more enrichment than tuition. based on our first session this past sunday (ie. yesterday), my preliminary impression is that she's bright. not near genius girl's supernova brightness, but above average nonetheless. this kid was also introduced/recommended by my dad. i think that he has his connections to the parents of gifted kids. but hey, if it means tuition prospects for me, i shouldn't complain, right?

the third unconfirmed kid has caught me in a dilemma. to borrow a phrase from my chemical engineer cousin, it's a head vs. heart situation...but with a slight twist. background info: i know this kid from somewhere other than tuition. logic (aka. my head) tells me that i should take this kid up, because it means more income for me, and i definitely can manage one more student. on a personal level, i do want this kid to do well, so i should take up the tuition prospect. and yet, another part of my heart tells me NOT to take this kid, because it'll mean more pain (on a personal level) for me. the for-and-against list does get more complicated than this, but i won't post anything else here for fear of self-incrimination.

it's getting late, so i shall end here for the time being. next post will most likely deal with parents, some philosophical stuff, and, if the date is right, the CJC open house.

-random thought of the day: Travelling ruins my mood.-