Starting the weekend with a rejection doesn't feel good, but it is what it is. i was thinking about all my applications so far, and i realized that i don't have a clear-cut preference/ranking system for every single firm that i've applied to. i have 2 main tiers - tier 1: one firm which i have the most hope for (since i attended their open day and received a generally welcoming vibe from them afterwards); and tier 2 - the rest. of course, i would be happy to receive an offer for any of the UK firms that i've applied to. i figure more results will start coming in from now until year-end.

actually, i wonder if it's a good thing that i haven't heard from some of the firms that i'd applied to in september. one way of thinking about it is that they're keeping me in consideration and not rejecting me outright, unlike some other firms that have already sent me rejections. the other possibility is that maybe the firms where my applications are still pending have simply not started looking at applications yet. related thought: why have some firms rejected me already? i'm inclined to think that it's because of my visa status, but there's no point in worrying about it.

due to the tense state of affairs in some parts of the world today, i've actually wondered if it would be better (safer) for me to just remain in asia. by that, i mean going back to singapore after JET, and trying to make a life for myself there. one particular thought i remember having was, 'what if my plane gets shot down over ukraine or some other war zone?' and then i think that singapore airlines operates multiple flights every day along that route, and i haven't heard of anything bad happening yet, so the chances that something bad happens to my flight in particular is quite low...but not zero. well, i also thought of a quote that i once heard. i don't know the exact phrasing, but googling the key words turned up, "a ship in harbour is safe, but that's not what ships were built for". hopefully i can convince myself of that.

still trying to think about whether i should plan a trip back to singapore. i realize that it's not cost-effective, since i'll be going back in march-ish anyway, but the main benefit of making a short trip back is that i can bring stuff back to japan for people. i'm actually tempted to bring a secondary school english assessment book back for one of the english teachers i work with, just to give her an idea of what native english-speaking kids of an equivalent age learn. apart from that, there's no longer a pressing reason for me to go back, especially since the bicycle shop people said that they could hold the bicycle for me until march. what i'll probably end up doing is an osaka/kobe trip as previously planned, and then buy another piece of luggage or two and pay extra baggage fees for the trip back. i do need another suitcase, since i have to return the one i borrowed to my aunt anyway. also, i think having a wheeled carry-on would be more convenient than my messenger bag, which i've been using so far.

the new guy starts next monday. i'm not worried per se, because i know we're on the same page...more or less. still, i think there'll be some level of...competition? or maybe i'm thinking too much. the eiken results will come out too. as bad as it sounds, i'm hoping that not too many people pass. while i can rack up the extra hours of off-in-lieu, there are kids that i don't particularly want to help. but whatever it ends up being, i'll be professional about it.

-random thought of the day: Laundry tomorrow.-